A Day in the Life

Today was my 13,505th day of life (that's 37 years for you mathematically challenged :-) It began at 6:01 am with a little raspy voiced R saying in a silly sing songy voice "Happy birthday to my favorite 47 year old Mommy!' (I only had to correct him once that it was 37 not 47!) This was followed by sweet snuggles with all three before picking my phone up from the charger to find fun facebook birthday messages!

By 6:40 am, I was playing the Wii with my delighted children (who were celebrating their first day of Fall break!) When I made it to the kitchen to start breakfast I was greeted by gifts the kids had picked out and a call from my husband that he was on his way back home from early morning rounds with pancakes and eggs from Krystal "so I didn't have to get my clean kitchen dirty." That's a good man that understands the beauty of a clean kitchen!

Right after breakfast, I was given the precious gift of a squirmy, live earthworm from my delicate flower of a daughter. This was followed by her (much more appreciated) offer to help with laundry. My sweet curly girl spent an hour helping me get things folded and put away without complaint. As we finished she had two questions: "How much money did I earn?" and
"Why are you doing all this laundry on your BIRTHDAY?"

Point well taken, we packed up the car and headed for Starbucks to redeem my free birthday latte (as well as some delicious iced lemon pound cake). Yum! This was followed by an hour reading in Barnes & Noble before running a few boring, but necessary, errands.

We returned home to more sweet birthday messages from friends near and far, a package on the doorstep (Thanks, Emily!) and a delivery of chocolate covered fruit from Edible Arrangements. (Thanks, Aunt Boo!)

Around 12:30 Daddy came home with my favorite Thai food. (Is it any wonder I have reflux? Coffee, chocolate, thai food, oh my!) After lunch we had a neighbor come over for a couple of hours to play, which allowed me to catch my breath for a bit.

After a quick visit from another dear friend, the late afternoon/evening marathon began: dinner, football game and kung fu.

All was not perfect...one of my people had a sidelining tummy ache earlier in the day, followed by an unfortunate potty accident tonight while we were out and about as a result of my Milk of Magnesia anecdote. Cleaning up big kid potty accidents is no fun. My husband was on call and, therefore, mostly absent and at the mercy of his pager. Our little football team got decimated by our opponent. My house has been turned upside down by rowdy children. I am painfully behind on my to do list. After a couple more loads of laundry, you cannot even tell K & I made any progress this morning. And tonight as I tried to brew my nightly indulgence, a warm cup of tea, my coffee pot went on the blink. In other words, life happened here today.

But, honestly, it was a BEAUTIFUL birthday. I was with my people. I was reminded via text, phone, email and facebook of the many precious relationships I am fortunate to enjoy. My husband has a secure job. I have a home and children who are active and healthy enough to trash it in short order. I have the peace of knowing that I have a loving Father who has a plan.

The encouragement and affirmation I received today was a precious blessing. It challenged me to be better about reaching out and speaking words of life into the people I encounter. People love to know they were thought about. Each comment or text took less that 10 seconds to type and send--yet it refreshed my soul.

I feel blessed beyond measure--primarily because of things that cannot be quantified--joy, love, peace, friendship. If the first 20 hours are any indication, I am going to love 37!

The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. Psalm 16:6 NIV

Me, According to Them: Take II

I did this last February with my children. It was so entertaining that I decided to try it again this year. I separated the children this time so they could not hear the others' answers...and I did not let them see their answers from last year. It is funny to me how similar some of them still are!

1. What is something Mom always says to you?
R "I love you."
P "I love you."
K "Why are you asking me?"

2. What makes Mom happy?
R "When I listen."
P "When I hug her."
K "When we do stuff for you and when we obey."

3. What makes Mom sad?
R "When I don't listen."
P "When I do bad things."
K "When we don't obey."

4. How does your Mom make you laugh?
R "Being funny, telling me jokes but not tickling me because I am really not ticklish anymore." (I tickled him to check and he is actually still very ticklish!)
P "Tickle me."
K- "When you tickle me."

5. What was your Mom like as a child?
R "I do not know. I think she did not know how much kids she would have one day."
P "Umm. She didn't watch tv because there was no tvs."
K "I don't know."

6. How old is your Mom? (35)
R "35"
P "I don't know. I think 35."
K "I don't really know. 38? 39? 40?"

7. How tall is your Mom?
R "I do not know."
P "Umm. Smaller than Daddy."
K "I don't know."

8. What is her favorite thing to do?
R "Play with me and hug me and kiss me."
P "Play with me."
K "Play with us."

9. What does your Mom do when you're not around?
R "I do not know."
P "Do work--like Mommy work."
K "I don't know. I think after school she tells us tall tales about what she did while we were at school."

10. If your Mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
R "Rock star."
P "Because she likes me."
K "For helping."

11. What is your Mom really good at?
R "Sewing." (Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha) "And playing baseball."
P "Kissing me."
K "Helping the kids at the Home."

12. What is your Mom not very good at?
R "Nothing"
P "Racing us."
K "Umm. I don't know."

13. What does your Mom do for a job?
R "Work, errands and laundry."
P "Do work...Mommy work."
K "Help the kids at the Home."

14.What is your Mom's favorite food?
R "Steak."
P "Strawberries."
K "Oranges"

15.What makes you proud of your Mom?
R "When she plays with me for a whole day."
P "When she hugs me and kisses me."
K "When she gives us a treat."

16. If your Mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
R "Tom & Jerry"
P "Minnie"
K "Minnie!"

17. What do you and your Mom do together?
R "We play games."
P "Play tag."
K "Read."

18. How are you and your Mom the same?
R "Our eyes are the same color."
P "We have the same color eyes."
K "We are both girls."

19. How are you and your Mom different?
R "We have different kinds of hair because mine is short and yours is long."
P "We don't have the same color hair."
K "You are a grown up and I am not."

20. How do you know your Mom loves you?
R "Because she is my Mom and she tells me that."
P "Because she says that to me."
K "Because you kiss me and hug me all the time."

21. What does your Mom like most about your Dad?
R "Because he works on the patio for you when he is home."
P "That she just really likes him."
K "I don't really know."

22. Where is your Mom's favorite place to go?
R "Destin, FL. I knew you would like that one. Do you like my answers the best? I won't tell K & P."
P "Colorado."
K "The Childrens Home"

Honored

My family & I had a very special night Saturday at our area Heart Ball. I had the honor of being recognized for community service, so the children came for the pre-party photos and left with a sitter before the 'main event.'

How can these big kids be my family?

My Mom, Dad and my in-laws were kind to come into town for the event.

I must confess that as completely honored and humbled as I was by the recognition, I have been very uneasy about how to handle it all. I have spent a good deal of time trying to pinpoint why I felt so strange about it. I think there are a few reasons:

1- While it is certainly nice to be appreciated, I know better than to buy into too much hype about myself. I am not super woman. All of life involves tradeoffs. I should probably spend a bit more time in the kitchen, at the gym, in the laundry room or working with my hands...but I enjoy the fulfillment and escapism of volunteering more.

2- In many ways I give out of plenty while many others give more sacrificially of their time, talents and resources. I am able to volunteer because I have a husband whose hard work allows me to work for free. My children are in school 30 hours a week, so I have time to give.

From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked. Luke 12:48 (NIV)

3- I am not a martyr. My volunteerism is not all sacrifice. I reap much from it. I enjoy serving in the places where I volunteer. I believe that this is the work God created me for (Ephesians 2:10). I have learned so much about the Gospel, the heart of God, myself and life in general through the work God has allowed me to do.

I hope this doesn't sound ungrateful. The event was wonderful. I was completely shocked that I was chosen as an honoree. I just want to keep it all in perspective.

After the event I came home, hung up the dress, washed off the make up and found myself wondering how to live up to the honor. Then I prayed God alone would be my motivation and my guide, revealing at each new chapter of my life what He desires for me as wife, mother, daughter, friend and servant--aware that different roles will likely take priority at various places along this journey.

30 Something

Today marks my 35th trip around the sun. Say what you will about the facebook phenomenon, but the very best thing about it is your birthday. Because there is a tickler reminding all of your friends that it is your special day, well wishes come pouring in from various parts of your life. I got a kick out of a couple of the messages today from people I haven't seen in over 20 years. One in particular spoke of my 'Betty Boop sweatshirt and leggings' circa 1985. I haven't even thought about that outfit in decades..and yet, to Cynthia, it is how I am frozen in her mind. I had an over permed bob and loved to wear folded down ruffle socks with my tennis shoes because I had seen something like it in a ZZ Top video.

Various people from my past used nicknames that take me right back to certain periods of my life, Doodle Bug , Youngie, JY. Their memories of my outfits would range from jeans that were way too baggy and pin rolled at the ankle to jeans that were a bit too tight thanks to my freshman 15 at Alabama.

Those faces represent a composite of my days in Alabama, Georgia and Virginia, work friends, school friends and people I met through Young Life or theater. Some knew me with long straight hair others with a short curly Aussie Scrunch Bob. In the minds of some I drive a Honda Accord as a constantly road tripping single girl...to others I have always been a mother of triplets in a beaten up Yukon.

Would those people from way back be surprised to know that I am grace professing Christ follower? Did they have unfortunate experiences with me in particularly zealous seasons of my life? Do they remember me as judgmental? Loud? Loving and kind? Or do they remember me from times when I was intent on proving to the world that I was still 'fun' and they couldn't just peg me a good girl and move on....naval ring simply for the shock factor, anyone?

The mosaic of faces that have greeted me with well wishes today represent so many different seasons and places...some I embrace more readily than others, but they are all part of the testimony God is building in my life.

Had you asked me a decade ago about 35, I would have thought of this age as being kind of 'stuck.' My twenty-something self would have been intimidated at the thought of children, marriage, mortgage, carpooling, homework, committees and the like. But I had it all wrong.

All of those other chapters have been necessary for this...la bella vida...the beautiful life. Yes, I drive a complete Mom-mobile full of crumbs and lost toys. I rarely look that pulled together because getting everyone else together and out the door leaves little time for me to primp. Some days I seem too serious and/or busy. I get frustrated about little things that don't really matter more often than I should...

But, don't be deceived. If you were to glimpse into this 35 year old heart you would find contentment, joy, peace and gratitude. This is the skin God gave me (freckled and sun damaged as it may be), and I am quite comfy in it. I feel loved, accepted and vital. I am enjoying this place and the callings that have come with it.

Thank you, God, for all that you have entrusted to me thus far. The experiences I struggled to understand, the seasons I fumbled through, the people you brought into and out of my life every step of the way so far. There is a godly thread, weaving this live together.

I pray that I may be found as a faithful steward. I cannot wait to see where we are headed next!

Confessions of a Mid-30s Woman

At 8am, K had been fever free for just over 24 hours--so back to school she went. Two hours later I got a phone call from the school. P had a 103+ temp. Thankfully, that small window of solo time allowed me to make it to the grocery store. After 6 straight days of sick children, there seemed to be an echo in my pantry and refrigerator.

I took P to the pediatrician to find out if it was strep like his brother or the fever virus like K. He tested positive for strep. The good news is that an antibiotic has already been administered--so hopefully he'll bounce back within 24 hours.

During my few days of spending additional time at home, I have found myself entering a bit of a funk. After praying about it today, I have realized it is a direct result of comparison with others. With my idle time I have been 'checking in' on people on facebook and their blogs. As I do so, I find myself wondering how they have aged so well--and wishing I still had my old skin and hair. I feel like a ridiculous 15 year old.

I don't want to be a supermodel. I just want to feel pretty and pulled together...but, truthfully, it is not really who I am. I don't know how to primp and accessorize like a good Southern girl--and I don't really enjoy doing so. I've never colored my hair or had plastic surgery. I'd rather spend time doing other things than staring at a mirror working on my appearance. So, jeans and ponytails suit me just fine, until I look at a picture of myself or walk past a mirror and cringe.

The truth is this has VERY LITTLE to do with what any one else thinks of me. It has everything to do with what I am thinking about myself.

The most frustrating part is that I know truth and somehow the Devil still gets a little foothold and tries to eat me up. I am ashamed to even be entertaining such superficial and shallow thoughts. Frankly, I cannot decide which is worse: the yucky, critical thoughts I am feeling about myself or the guilt and shame I feel over how silly it is.

I am confessing all this because it is the truth of where I am today. It is embarrassing, but I want to get it all worked out before K is old enough to feel this way. I want to be able to model healthy self image for her. I am asking God to bring perspective and peace to my heart.

The other lesson this has reminded me is the age old truth that comparison is the thief of all joy. I have so very much to be thankful for: my salvation, a purpose to my life, a loving husband, precious children, caring friends. How dare I be so ungrateful? It is ridiculous!

I pray that the Enemy will have NO foothold in my life--that I may be able to rejoice in the truth that I am an individual, uniquely created by my Heavenly Father to do work He has for my life. I am fearfully and wonderfully made...laugh lines, gray hair, sun damaged skin, squinty eyes and all!

Me, According to Them

I got this great idea from Perri. (It is significant to note that they were having breakfast, so you'll know I am not as food obsessed as some of their answers might otherwise indicate. )

1. What is something Mom always says to you?
R "I Forgot" (I think he meant that he couldn't think of anything...but he may very well have meant that I forget things a lot.)
P "What kind of cereal would you like?"
K "Eat!"

2. What makes Mom happy?
R "When I love on you."
P "When I eat."
K "When I do something that you didn't even ask me."

3. What makes Mom sad?
R "When I do something bad."
P "When my brother hits me." (R retorted, "I just did that when I was three and four, not four and a half.")
K "When I don't come when my Mommy asks me to."

4. How does your Mom make you laugh?
R "When you tell me jokes."
P "I'm going to tell you how I make you laugh...when I tell a silly green monster story."
K- "Tickle me."

5. What was your Mom like as a child?
R "Like you, but littler."
P "Like our age"
K "Like the beach." (?)

6. How old is your Mom? (34)
R "12"
P "20"
K "30...Mom, why are all these questions about you?"

7. How tall is your Mom?
R "I forgot."
P "44 feet"
K "11" (She did this cute thing with squinty eyes and her hand as she counted up my body.)

8. What is her favorite thing to do?
R "Play with us."
P "Play with me."
K "Play with me."

9. What does your Mom do when you're not around?
R "Works"
P "Cry" (This really made me laugh. I guess I shouldn't say I have missed him when I pick him up after school.)
K "Wash the clothes"

10. If your Mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
R "Rock Star!" (giggles)
P "Rock Star!" (more giggles)
K "I don't know what famous is."

11. What is your Mom really good at?
R "Playing baseball with me."
P "Being a deejay."
K "Doing work and being a Mommy and take caring of us."

12. What is your Mom not very good at?
R "The race car Wii"
P "Exercise Wii."
K "Writing or painting"

13. What does your Mom do for a job?
R "Clean the clothes."
P "Wash the dishes."
K "Take care of her kids and make sure they don't lie."

14.What is your Mom's favorite food?
R "Lettuce"
P "Salad with dressing on top."
K "Salad"

15.What makes you proud of your Mom?
R "When you get magnets on the board." (This is their reward system that R has decided to use to reward me too. :-)
P "When...the same thing R said."
K "Can you tell me some stuff that I can say?"

16. If your Mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
R "Lightning McQueen and Mater--both of them."
P "Green Monster with one eyeball."
K "Minnie."

17. What do you and your Mom do together?
R "We play sometimes."
P "We play bouncy ball games."
K "Go on errands sometimes."

18. How are you and your Mom the same?
R "You and me have black hair."
P "We eat the same cereal."
K "We have the same color eyes."

19. How are you and your Mom different?
R "Nothing!" (incredulously!)
P "You have dark hair and I have lighter hair."
K "You have straight hair and I have curly hair."

20. How do you know your Mom loves you?
R "When you kiss me and love me."
P "When you hug me."
K "Because I just know."

21. What does your Mom like most about your dad?
R "Going to Disney World with us."
P "When he washes the dishes."
K "When he loves on you. I see him do that sometimes."

22. Where is your Mom's favorite place to go?
R "Disney"
P "California"
K "Disney"

My 1000th Post

I have said numerous times that I tend to be more of a sprinter than a marathoner...so the fact that this blogging habit has continued for 1,000 entries over almost 3 and a half years is astonishing. I have been pondering how to mark the occasion, but nothing spectacular came to mind. So, I decided to take a walk down memory lane by checking in on posts along the way. In its randomness, it proved to be a fitting tribute to the twists and turns of this journey so far:

My 100th post recorded a sweet bedtime interaction between the boys when they were barely 2 years old. As I re-read it I vaguely recalled the moment. They were still in cribs! Where has time gone? (I actually did 100th and 200th post memes, but looking back I realized they were not on the official dates.)

My 200th post was written almost exactly 2 years ago. It was a psalm of praise and remembrance to God and includes the photos I once used in my blog header.

My 300th post was written in February of 2007 when I spent a month highlighting daily prayers for our children. This particular post is about the virtues of kindness and generosity.

My 400th post was a gut-wrenchingly honest assessment of my own sin condition. It, too, seemed to resonate with other 'good' Christian girls.

My 500th post was written on the first day of 3 year old preschool.

My 600th post was written after a particularly bad Monday. Mercifully, I barely remembered it all until I re-read the post.

My 700th post is pictures of the children making sand angels at the beach back in March.

My 800th post was written early this past Summer, on the eve of our family trip to Colorado.

My 900th post was ironically, the second most commented on post I have ever written. The subject was marriage--and it apparently resonated with lots of folks.

I also decided to start a new type of post on Wednesdays. (Melissa posted this idea in my comments section several weeks ago.) Since one of the motivations for these entries is to leave a legacy of sorts for my children, I will use Wednesdays to tell stories that happened before my life (and theirs) was recorded on the world wide web. I hope to include memories about my childhood, recollections of pivotal moments and insight into some of their relatives they never were able to get to know.

Only God knows what the next 1000 posts will bring...

Resolutions

Although I am not a huge fan of New Year's resolutions, I do find that when I want to start something new I tend to wait for a Monday or a new beginning (1st of the month, when school starts back, etc...). In keeping with that quirk, I decided this week to make two new resolutions for my 35th year:

1. I am going to cook at least 2 (but shooting for 3) dinners a week. I know to many people it sounds insane that that low number would be my goal, but we have gotten into a terrible habit of eating out all the time. I have tried to dissect what my issue(s) with cooking are and have decided it is 85% a lack of planning. The thought of dinner does not come on my radar screen until 5:30 or so--and due to the unpredictable nature of his career, I often do not know if my husband will be joining us or not until 6ish. By then, children are crabby, I am tired and it is easier to throw up my hands and head for a restaurant.

The other 15% is the dreaded clean-up after cooking. I know it is incredibly shallow. It is just true. I like a clean kitchen, but am tired at the end of the day. Going out makes it someone else's problem.

So, I am working on it. My friend Georgia Mom has been telling me about her success with e-mealz so I am going to try that. I also enjoy crockpot cooking this time of year and have learned there are several sites devoted to crockpot recipes. I cooked Saturday night and again tonight with success. This has helped motivate me to keep it up.

2. I am going to suck it up and block off a half day to go to an Apple store and get a tutorial so I will actually start using the Mac my hubby bought me 8 months ago. I am still clinging to my battered old (PC) laptop like it is a security blanket. I get the 'blue screen of death' weekly and know that it is a ticking time bomb. Not to mention the fact that there are a few keys I can no longer read (a, n, down arrow) and my wireless card is being help together by duct tape. I also decided yesterday that, overall, I really am enjoying getting older. I wish it did not involve random dark hair on my chin or the plethora of laugh lines taking up residence on my face, but the life experience and the way God is pulling things He has taught me so far together in my heart and mind to make sense of this world--that peace that comes with feeling like roots are being firmly established--I like that part of growing older.

So here's to more spiritual maturity and less physical aging, solid relationships with God and others who point us in His direction and another year of striving to love well!

Good Intentions

I was once addicted to productivity. When we lived in Atlanta (before children) I commuted 100 miles to work twice a week. I would get up at 5 am in order to be on the road by 6, work through lunch and into the evening, go to bed late and do it all again the next day. Somehow I was truly fine with 6 hours of sleep per night. This all changed when I turned 30/had triplets/started taking cardiac meds (all happened simultaneously, so I am not sure which to blame) Now, if I do not get 8-9 hours of sleep I feel terrible.

I am still trying to give myself permission to not complete my to do list--and to realize this chapter of my life is very difficult to live from a list anyway! Lately I have been feeling frustrated with myself because I seem to have a problem with finishing what I start. In terms of full disclosure, this is my current list of open-ended items on my To Do list.

• I pledged to read the Bible from start to finish after Deeper Still. I found a great in-a-year schedule online, started July 15th and am stuck around August 12th.

• I fell off the gym wagon the week before vacation and am having a hard time getting back in the groove.

• When the kids started school I decided I was going to start cooking more. I guess I have sort of kept this one...since more than never just means rarely. I made spaghetti tonight, so I am making a little progress here, but nothing like I expected.

• Don't even get me started on the stack of unread books...
  

• And my Excel master To Do list I made for all the 'free time' once the kids went back to school? Well, there are still 25 items on there.

I don't like to think of myself as all talk and no action. There is still a lot of action...I just think I tend to try to tackle A LOT and I get tired. Or maybe I get bored and distracted. Perhaps it is actually a virtue, not a vice because I am 'flexible' and able to constantly shift priorities. Think that excuse would work in a job interview?

I really want to have a good work ethic for my witness, for my children and for my own character. Generally, I enjoy being productive, but each evening after I put the children to bed, I am simply spent. I just cannot seem to muster the energy required to keep ticking things off the list. So, I come to my comfy spot on the sofa with my hot tea and my laptop, recap the day on the blog, do a little reading and rest. Why do we feel so guilty about rest anyway? According to the Bible it is a blessing.

"In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat— for He grants sleep to those he loves." Psalm 127:2

Besides, the list will still be here tomorrow.

All My "Free" Time

The prevalent question now that the children are back in school is what am I doing with all my 'free time.' After almost 2 weeks, my answer is that I am not sure what I did without it.

This week has been especially hairy, as the state of Georgia is experiencing a very serious budget deficit. As a result the children's home I am involved in is about to experience major budget cuts. We already run a lean organization, so it is involving lots of meetings and creative thought to decide where to go from here in terms of financing our care for abused and neglected children.

Monday and Tuesday I was busy co-hosting a children's clothing trunk show. This is the first time I have done this--and although it was a lot of work, to have two nice outfits for each of the children 'paid for' was a great reward!

Today I journeyed to Atlanta for a hair appointment--including a chemical straightening treatment--so I now get to spend the next three days keeping my hair dry at all costs (during hurricane season, no less.) The hardest part is that I also am not allowed to tuck it behind my ears--a serious habit of mine. And I am not looking forward to telling my exercise group Friday that I cannot sweat.

The advantage of this trip was that I finally finished my book. All I can say is that it should have come with a warning about reading the last third in public. At one point, as my hair was being treated I was so teary I could not read the words on the page. The stylist asked me if I was having trouble with the vapors from the chemicals he was using.

K had her first science project this week, so Daddy & I spent some quality time with paper mache the last couple of evenings as we fashioned a comet for her to paint. She was so proud of her final product--and we got even more experience with trying to explain to the boys why she got to make one and they did not.

And have I mentioned that we leave for a week at Disney on Sunday? The children are absolutely beside themselves with excitement. I purchased a book written by kids for kids and they have been pouring over it. I am quite certain they will know more about the rides than we do by the time we arrive!

Let's Talk About Me

I don't do memes very often. (I have plenty to talk about without prodding. :-) But this one was cute and included things I have never written about. So, Joni, this is for you!

What were you doing 10 years ago?
I was living in Columbus, GA and commuting to Atlanta A LOT for dates with my now-husband. I was crazy about him--but not sure if the feeling was mutual. Frankly, because he was working 120+ hours a week (I am NOT exaggerating), he often fell asleep during our dates. The most memorable time was when we were at Music Midtown at 4 in the afternoon with thousands of other people, surrounded by 4 stages with live music blaring and he sat down against a chain link fence and took a nap.

During the week I was working for a financial services holding company as a project manager for a corporate reorganization. I owned a house and had a roommate named Leslie.

Favorite Snacks
Because it is Summer, I am loving blueberries, strawberries and peaches (sometimes even with whipped cream on top)

Anything salty (Chex mix, cashews, vinegar & salt chips, chips and salsa)

Cold Diet Coke (in a can or bottle--no ice and not from a fountain!)

To Do List
I am a HUGE fan of the To Do list. I have tried dozens of approaches to 'the perfect list,' but my preferred method is low tech. I carry a small, lined pad with three headings: Call/E-mail, Do, and Go. Crossing things off is the ultimate reward.

On Sundays I rewrite a fresh list for the week. There are currently 31 things on my list (and 7 of them have been on there for more than a month!)

Jobs I Have Had:
Babysitter, Personal Assistant/Framing Shop Attendant (that boss was a piece of work), Longhorn Waitress, Bank Teller, Financial Services Assistant, '96 Olympic Games Opening and Closing Ceremonies Production Intern, Corporate Recruiter, Supermarket Bank Manager, Leadership Development, Private Banker

Places I Have Lived
Georgia, Alabama, Virginia

Bad Habits
Not planning my meals and eating whatever is available instead
Talking more than I listen
Not using sunscreen
Shopping as an escape/coping mechanism
Impatience
Caffeine

5 Random Things People May Not Know
Is there anything left?

I once had my belly button pierced just because it was out of character and no one thought I would do it. It lasted about a month.

I considered going to law school after a couple of years in the workplace. I even went to an LSAT prep course.

If the triplets had been girls they were going to be named Elizabeth(after my mom), Caroline (after my mother-in-law) and K (because we liked it).

My son, R, is the 6th generation R. Scott, but we change first names to reflect the maternal grandfather's name, so he is not 'the 6th.'

I am not a Tom Boy, per se, but I am not afraid of bugs, frogs, spiders, etc... It probably has something to do with growing up in rural Alabama.

CDs I would want if stranded on an island:
David Crowder Band, Jennifer Knapp, Best of Passion (So Far), Indigo Girls

What I'd Do if I Were a Billionaire:
Furnish my empty room, pay off our mortgage, pay someone to put away my laundry, employ a meal planner/chef and spend my days giving the rest away to ministries that serve the needy.

Anybody else want to play?

Atlanta or Bust!

I am on my way to Deeper Still with an amazing group of women. My next door neighbor, my accountability partner, my best friend from high school, and other precious friends.

The timing of this break is fantastic. I bought these tickets 9 months ago, never knowing how I would need this break! (But God did.)

Here's to girlfriends, good food, gabbing, hearing the Word from gifted teachers, praise music from Mandisa & Travis Cottrell and hotel rooms with no small children standing next to your bed before sunrise...

Eight Random Things

I cannot decide if my brain is turning to Summer mush or if I am still waiting for 'the dust to settle' after returning from our trip. (Is that even realistic?) But, I am a bit scattered these days.

Since I am having a hard time pulling together a cohesive thought and I recently crossed the threshold of my 800th post, I thought I'd try to list 8 random things I have never addressed on the blog. After 800 posts, it is going to be a challenge to think of any stones I have left unturned, but here's my stream of consciousness attempt.

1. People ask how I have time to blog. It really doesn't take very long. My blogging ritual happens immediately after I put the children to bed each night. I head back downstairs and make myself a hot cup of tea (Stonewall Kitchen's Raspberry Peach--YUM!), then sit on the sofa with my laptop. Generally, my hubby is either still at work or next to me on the sofa signing charts on his laptop. It generally takes 30 minutes or so--and as I have said, it is my decompression time.

2. I have a new Tivo addiction, Intervention, on A&E. I am so intrigued by addiction and the way these folks are so clearly in bondage. I know it is a picture of our spiritual condition, but at the same time it is baffling and heartbreaking. I cannot imagine being a mother of an addict and watching my children trapped and slowly killing themselves. I have seen addiction up close in my life, but something about the rawness of this show just gets me.

3. I was planning to write a post about the beauty of Silly Putty and what a great, old faithful toy it is after the hours of entertainment it provided while we were traveling. That all changed yesterday when K sat on hers as we ran errands in 93 degree heat. It melted into her car seat, her clothes and the upholstery on the back of the seat in front of hers. I've been googling solutions and they all seem like a real pain, involving several steps, so I am basically in denial.

4. I am completely ashamed to admit that our family has not been recycling other than donating used things. In our old house there was no pick up because we were in the county and "I had three babies" as an excuse. Since we moved into the city I have known I need to get with the program, but just haven't gotten around to picking up the city issued bucket--for 15 months! YIKES! I am confessing this online as the ultimate accountability for me to spare the 20 minutes to drive over and pick up the bucket and start recycling. I know it will be a great lesson for my children and it is the right thing to do. I have 'pick up bucket' on my list for tomorrow.

5. My transition from PC user to the Mac is not going so well. I would equate it to trying to teach myself to give up being left handed and use my right hand predominantly instead. It just feels unnatural. I am still using my old PC laptop 75% of the time which is literally duct taped together and has a few of the letters rubbed off the keyboard. It's like an old comfy pair of jeans. Maybe I need an intervention...

6. My little P has suddenly experienced a confidence explosion and it is really fun to watch. I know I should raise him to walk in humility, but right now I am enjoying seeing him blossom and learn to try new things. In the last couple of days he has said the following. "I like me." "I am great at this." "I am important." "I want to thank God for making me when we pray." The world will attempt to suck this out of him soon enough. I think every 4 year old boy (and girl) should get to feel invincible while he/she can.

7. Monday the kids caught me "shhhh"-ing myself. I was really frustrated with something silly one of the children had done that made a huge mess. As I was about to snap at them I caught myself and let out an audible, "Shhh!" P's eyes grew wide as he said, "I didn't say anyfing, Mommy." Then the ever-curious K said, 'Who were you shh-ing?" and I had to admit it was myself. You can imagine the crazy stares and follow up questions that prompted. I can hear them on their therapist's sofa one day...

8. The kids and I are in a really good place with each other since we returned from our trip. I am loving age 4 SO MUCH!!! It seems to be a precious place where they are still innocent and sweet, yet just independent enough to allow me to breathe a little. Their personalities, relationships and conversations with each other are pure sweetness. (Well, most of the time...)They are absolutely my little buddies and I really WANT to be with them as much as I can because I want to soak this all in. Today in the shallow end at the pool they were all three hugging me, giggling and hanging from me and God blessed me with the insight to just take a deep breath and smile. It was, as Max Lucado calls it, an eternal instant. A perfect moment to sear into my memory. Simple, joyful and full of love!

Wow! This turned into more of a confessional than a meme, but it was certainly cathartic!

Self Portrait

This is for those of you who wanted a picture of me in the sidebar. :-) I tried to take one of myself in the mirror after dinner tonight. It didn't work out very well because of the flash. But I thought I'd post my effort to prove that 1- I tried and 2- I am a complete dork with no shame.

Next time I should just get one of the children to do it.

Can you tell I am loopy from my husband being on call all weekend and the children being out of school?

Preparations & Playdates

We are leaving bright and early in the morning for a little getaway to the beach. As a result, I spent ALL DAY today washing every single article of clothing we own, cleaning house, packing, and scrubbing.

I have this hang-up (actually I have a lot of hang-ups) about leaving my house clean. I try to tidy up and make beds before we leave the house each morning, and a trip out of town is an invitation for serious organization. I feel like I have started out behind when I have to come home to a mess. I must leave things in good shape if I want to relax while we are away.

Honestly, I think I also equate it with the age-old 'wear clean undies in case you are in a car accident' advice always attributed to Southern mothers. I actually told my husband recently (as I was sweeping the kitchen while he & the children waited in a running car) that I needed to know that if we were in an accident and someone else had to come into our house to retrieve belongings they wouldn't exclaim, "Wow! They lived in this mess?"

I told you I have a lot of hang-ups.

While I packed and cleaned and organized my neurotic heart out, Grandmother & Grandaddy Scott came in town for individual dates with the children. They started with a trip to a local tea room with K. I am told she dressed up, sipped strawberry tea and had a grand time as their singular object of affection.

After an interlude of ice cream with all three, the grandparents ventured out to Barnes & Noble with R. He apparently provided a tour of our fair city as they drove.
"This is where we go to gymnastics."
"This is where Mommy buys the groceries."
"That's the way to preschool and church."
And as they passed TJ Maxx, "This is where Mommy buys wallets."
After reading for a bit and playing with the trains, they returned home for their final date.

P chose a trip to the mall's indoor playground, where he "showed them all his tricks" on the slide. (and talked their ears off, as any good 3 1/2 year old would do!)

After I put the children down for their rest time I watched as the grandparents walked back oout to their car. I couldn't help but think they would be enjoying a long nap upon their return home, too!

Testing: One, Two, Three

"Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the LORD."
Lamentations 3:40

Last January, I wrote a post chronicling the wrestling match that had been going on in my heart and head over my involvement in ministry outside our home. I realize this is a very personal decision for women and I think God has different purposes for different people. I sought God's Will for our family by going through a study on purpose with my accountability partner, prayer and seeking wise counsel from a couple of godly older women in my life. I became convinced that God did have ministry work for me to do outside the walls of my home as long as it was within well-defined parameters. I prayed for His vision and subsequent blessing, as I simultaneously committed to keeping the needs of my family first.

I have always been an over-committer, a true 'burning the candle at both ends' kind of girl. Motherhood and my heart medication have demanded that I get this weakness under control. I am not gifted in hospitality or the craftier side of homemaking. Oh, how I admire those who can make things with their hands! My gifts lend themselves much more to making things with ideas. My gifts are in adminstration, organization and leadership.

This month I began my two-year term as the chairman of the board of directors for the group home for foster children I've been involved with for the past five years. We have an excellent staff, so my time committment is primarily to be available for consultation via phone and e-mail and meetings maybe 3-4 hours a week. I love this work. It energizes me and blesses my family to get to share ourselves and our resources with children who have had a rough road in life thus far. It is a great fit to share the overflow of my 'parenting energy' in a place where parents have been absent. I try to take my children by the home periodically so they get a glimpse into this ministry as well. I want them to understand that when I am away from them it is in order to do something else important. One of my passions as a mother is to instill a heart for serving others in our children.

I take my role very seriously and want to serve with excellence and dependability. I want to honor my committment to the organization. You can imagine how humbling it has been to miss two meetings within the last week due to the illness of my children. I made a promise to my family and my God to keep them first. I don't regret that. I cannot and will not call a sitter to come sit with my sick children.

It has, however, been a real test to my ego and my pride. I am realizing a huge part of my identity is in being responsible, dependable and capable. I hate feeling like I have let people down. I certainly don't want to let my family down, but I don't want to let others down either. I don't have to tell those of you who work outside the home, this tightrope is hard!

Today I had a lunch meeting. At the outset I informed the folks that I would need to slip out at 12:45 to pick up the children, so we were already on a tight schedule. We had just gotten to the meat of our discussion when my cell phone vibrated. I recognized the number of the preschool. Their teacher informed me that P was having a very off day--screaming, crying, getting overwrought. He was inconsolable and needed his Mommy. Without hesitation, I excused myself from the meeting and went to be with my son. After a trip to the pediatrician we have confirmed that he, too, now has an ear infection...that is 3 ear infections in 7 days if you are counting (one in each child).

I feel like I am experiencing my first real test of my priorities. There is no question in my mind regarding what comes first. I just feel a bit guilty about what must come second as a result. Sometimes keeping your word and doing the right thing is hard. Despite my attempts to be many places and available to many in need, there is only one me. I cannot do it all. Who will get my best?

Lord, search me. Know me. I invite you to flush out my prideful motivation to be 'so capable' and make me instead fully dependent on You. I need you. Any of this work done without you, however well intentioned, is not your work at all. I recommit the work and the worker to You, Father.

2008: A Progress Report

Because I've blogged a lot lately about the energy level in our home, I thought this picture was a perfect example.

This was taken New Year's Eve as the children were playing in our front yard with friends and sparklers. Those faint little blurs like to move!

So far 2008 is amazing. I had an incredibly productive day today. For the first time in weeks, my laundry room is empty. Everything is clean and put away. The children even helped me reorganize the "dress up closet." Costumes are hanging, everything has its place. My great toy purge is continuing!

This afternoon our sitter came so I could hole up in the office and get organized. What a wonderful feeling to sort, file, shred and purge! I am a hopeless geek. It was completely fulfilling to get bills, statements and tax documents organized. I even got to listen to a great online sermon while I worked.

Then, while the boys napped, K & I reorganized the china cabinet.

Rather than being exhausted, I feel exhilarated. I realized over the last couple weeks that I can only hang out with no agenda for so long before it starts to really impact me negatively. I am wired for activity. I enjoy output, measurable results, productivity. I want to see that my work is making a difference.

Frankly, this is what makes motherhood so draining and frustrating for me. I want an immediate reward. Parenting is truly a marathon, and although there are certainly glimpses of results along the way--they can often seem few and far between.

My sole parenting resolution for 2008 is to pause and really 'see' my children. I want to give them at least 10 minutes a day of individual, delighted attention--the kind of excitement an extended family member brings when they come for a visit. I want to notice the neat things about who they are becoming and to rejoice with them in their realizations about the world. I am resolving to slow down long enough to laugh at their jokes, appreciate their individuality and share in their experience of life. In short, I want them to experience my enjoyment of them.

As a well-intentioned mama, I often inadvertently spend the majority of my time focussed on structure, rules, expectations, safety concerns, physical needs, behaviour, orchestrating life experiences, etc...and it leaves little room for pausing to look a child in the eyes and smile.

The last 2 days of attempting to do this have been RICHLY rewarding. I think this is a resolution it will be wildly satisfying to keep.

Randomness

Everyone is feeling much better here, but I have spent the day getting us back on track. As a result, I have no deep thoughts or hilarious quotes. Except for what happened last night at dinner. We were in a restaurant and my husband had taken one of the boys to the restroom. As he was walking back across the dining room, K spotted them and yelled, "Hey, Daddy? Did you poop or just tee tee?" Chuckles erupted from a couple of nearby tables.

Since I have nothing particularly meaningful to offer, how about a laugh or two at my expense. I received a fun "tag" from Kelli today, so here you go...seven completely random things about me.

1. I always drink fast food drinks with two straws. It started in high school when Randi was dating Katie's brother, Andy. He insisted that once you tried it there was no turning back. It is true. Once you've had sips that big, one straw is puny.

2. When reading fiction, I cannot resist reading the last page of a book first. Control freak who doesn't like surprises or wise woman who wants to manage her time efficiently and not waste it on something that ends badly...you decide. :-)

3. I rarely do memes. I tend to think of my blog as a place to record memories or share what's on my heart rather than structured writing exercises. That and I am still really juvenile and rebellious about random things...like memes.

4. One of my favorite things about being a Mama is dancing around the kitchen with my children, but I am not a good dancer and am really uncomfortable dancing in front of people.

5. I am anal about some things and incredibly laid back about others--and even I cannot explain why. All the bills in my wallet are in numerical order and facing the same way. My closet is arranged by type of clothing (pants, skirts, sweaters, long sleeve, short sleeve, suits/dresses, lounging clothes) and then by color (light to dark). Yet, I have a random drawer in every room of my house that is kind of a disaster, I haven't balanced my checkbook in years...and my car is disgusting!

6. My career goal for 7-8 years of my life was to be a television reporter or talk show host. I abandoned it my sophmore year of college and now haven't watched a talk show or television news in years.

7. I really hate being cold. I have Raynaud's which causes my fingertips and toes to turn white when it is below 60 degrees. Sometimes I wear gloves in the freezer section of the grocery store!

Just in case that was not enough, there are lots more random things about me here and here.

'74 was a Good Year

Tomorrow marks 33 years I have been on this Earth. I am happy and content. I feel loved and appreciated by my family and friends. I feel accepted and secure. Honestly, I don't really care about any sort of celebration. My children, on the other hand, are extremely excited about a birthday. They keep asking me what kind of birthday it is going to be. When I say "33" they look confused and say, "But what KIND of things will be on your cake?"

33 is sort of a dull milestone. I am finally at the age where I have to do quick math in my head to remember how old I am. I love being old enough to have seen a good bit, yet really aware that there is still MUCH I have yet to learn.

Since I do want this blog to be a keepsake for my children, I thought I'd try to think of a memory from each year of my life so far. I tried to write the first thing that occurred to me for each year. Warning: These are random and may make you wonder what kind of crazy person sits behind this keyboard.

1974: I was born in Columbus, GA. I was the first breach Lamaze baby delivered at St. Francis Hospital. The first child for my parents and the first baby in their group of friends. I had lots of "aunts" and "uncles."

1975: No memory.

1976: We moved into the home in Phenix City, AL where my parents still reside today.

1977: My little sister, Aunt Boo, was born. She completely rocked my world. I had been the only child for my parents and all their friends. I did not adjust well.

1978: I still have vague memories of Ms. Barbara's house where I attended day care while my parents worked. My Daddy worked directly across the street at the bank.

1979: I actually have very fuzzy memories of playing with my favorite little "boyfriend" Israel and climbing through the concrete tunnels on the playground. I also remember that my 5 year old cake was Wonder Woman and my Mom wore a black armband to protest the Iranian hostage crisis.

1980: I started Kindergarten and then was moved to First Grade within 2 weeks, forever sealing my position as the youngest and smallest in every class from that point on in my educational career.

1981: My most vivid memory of second grade was writing sentences during recess for talking too much during class. I seem to recall I missed a lot of recess.

1982: My favorite teacher, Mrs. Brown let me ride in her Trans Am on a field trip to Ft. Benning. She had a CB radio. Her handle was "Brown Sugar" and she made up one for me "Little Bit"

1983: My Granddaddy left my Grandmama for another woman. A defining moment in my life story.

1984: I began to feel God tugging on my heart. Church going had not been a major part of my family's life up until this point, but that year at VBS (under the teaching of precious Eileen Skipworth) I realized the church is where I wanted to be. I spent much of the next 8 years at First Baptist Columbus in GAs, Youth Choir, Sunday School, Wednesday Night Bible Study, etc...Despite all this, it was still a few more years before I made a real decision to not just be a church person, but to truly follow Christ.

1985: Honestly, all I remember about this year is my 5th grade teacher's horrible wig!

1986: During the 6th Grade Presidential Fitness Test I weighed 49 lbs and was 4 feet tall. My PE teacher, Mr. Screws, told me he was going to put fertilizer in my socks.

1987: As the congregation sang "I Surrender All" I accepted Christ during the end of Summer Youth led service at church.

This is also the year my sister, my aunt, my cousin and I were hit head on by a drunk driver traveling 70 miles an hour 2 days before Christmas. It is an absolute miracle we survived! This was before air bags...and it had only recently become a big deal to wear seat belts. Remember the whole Barbara Mandrell campaign?

1988: Starting high school in a new school, I remember what I wore as I stepped out of the car that first day and dropped my books all over the parking lot!

1989: I wore clothes that were entirely too big--ridiculously large, but I sure did peg those ankles and wore double socks...two colors to coordinate with my outfit!

1990: The smell of Aussie scrunch spray sizzling on a hot curling iron as we worked on our big hair at Jenny Colvard's house. I had a very thick, very curly, poodle-like bob. It was so big we called it "fi-fi" and in my yearbook picture all my hair didn't fit in the frame.

1991: Rewinding songs on cassette tapes over and over and over so we could write down every lyric (no google searches then) and memorize songs. Our greatest feat was REM "End of the World As We Know It."

1992: Senior year involved lots of pranks. Most memorable was the time my a half dozen of my Catholic school girlfriends and I toilet papered our boyfriends cars in the parking lot of their large public high school across town. (We didn't skip school, we had a half day.) Our boyfriends thought it would be cute to get their revenge by telling on us to their principal. The next day we were all paged to our principal's office and he sent us to apologize to the other principal across town. Two principals' offices in one day was a huge accomplishment for goody-goody honor students!

1993: Freshman year at the University of Alabama. Sorority rush. A National Championship football team. Standing on my own two feet. The death of a very close friend in a car accident. A difficult, but incredibly defining, year. Lifetime friendships made in my freshman dorm.

1994: This was the year that Daree, Becky and I decided to sneak into our football stadium in Tuscaloosa one night and take pictures of ourselves on the field. It was so much fun we drove all night to Auburn a couple of weeks later and broke in Jordan Hare Stadium. Why? Because we were silly and invincible in our own minds. We didn't harm anything or take anything. We just wanted to prove we could do it. I am still not sure how we pulled both of those off without getting caught. It never even occurred to us how much trouble we could have gotten in!

1995: The year of the roadtrip. One Saturday started in Tuscaloosa as Alabama played Arkansas. During halftime of that game, a couple of friends and I drove from Tuscaloosa to Baton Rouge to see Auburn play LSU. After the game we drove to New Orleans to spend the night then returned to Tuscaloosa the next day.

Over Thanksgiving, Jennifer Main and I drove from Tuscaloosa, AL to Denver, CO and back over the long weekend (and even managed to squeeze in a day of skiing in Vail).

I cannot count how many other trips we made, especially the 300 miles to Auburn and back singing Indigo Girls or Nanci Griffith at the top of our lungs.

1996: Graduating from college and moving to Atlanta for the Summer. Working for the events corporation that put on the Opening and Closing Ceremonies of the Olympics meant being on the field for the whole grand celebration. Packing up my car, leaving the stadium after closing ceremonies and driving South to Columbus. I arrived at 3am and started my first career-type job 5 hours later.

1997: Bridesmaid dresses and blind dates....double digits of both.

1998: The year I met the man I would marry.

1999: The house on East Wesley in Atlanta where I was reminded of the incredible importance of female friendship. There were always at least 4 girls living in that house. There was a bit of a revolving door due to engagements and marriages...but we had some wonderful times curled up with each other 4 to a sofa chatting about boys, life and love.

2000: I will never forget New Year's Eve with Tanya and Joanna in Highlands, NC. We had all had a rough 1999. We hiked up to the highest point we could find in Highlands to watch the sun set on that dreadful year and toasted to the lessons we had learned. We spent New Year's Day praying and talking about what God had for us in the year to come. (I will also never forget the back and forth cell phone calls that weekend as Suzanne had her 1st son 12-31-99)

2001: Reunited with the man of my dreams in a way that could truly only be described as the hand of God. What a fun time we had re-dating and appreciating the work God had done in each of our lives to mature us to who we needed to be in order to have a solid foundation for marriage.

2002: Married in February and moved to Virginia in June. Our first year of marriage was delightfully simple in a small apartment away from everything familiar.

2003: Received my infertility diagnosis in the 1st Quarter of the year, conceived in the 4th. Moved to a new town as a couple. Learning to be introduced as someone's wife instead of as just simply me. A mini-identity crisis. :-)

2004: The year of the children. I spent 5 months of this year pregnant, 2 months of hospital bedrest, 2 months visitting my NICU babies....then they came home and the rest of the year is a blur of sleeplessness, dirty diapers and LOTS of bottles.

2005: Re-emerging into life in the community. Becoming comfortable being introduced not only as someone's wife, but now also "the one with the triplets."

2006: Learning to embrace my role as stay-at-home mother and searching for God's vision/purpose for my life in and out of my home. Who am I besides someone's wife and the mother of triplets anyway?

2007: Being comfortable with my identity as a child of God...not content to give up the fight on the things in my life that need improvement...No way! Rather, recognizing all my flaws as signs of my need for a Savior. It certainly helps me understand the need for grace!

Moments are stressful. Situations are challenging. But, life? Life is really good.

Good grief! That was long. Makes me feel much older than I am.
Happy weekend!

A Cardiology Report

Last month I wore a cardiac event monitor under my clothing for 4 weeks as I fasted from caffeine. The purpose was to see how things were going with my heart. The monitor recorded a handful of premature ventricular and atrial contractions (AKA heart skipping beats) each day but those are not really harmful, fairly common and not something you necessarily treat.

The good news is that my cardiologist said I can have caffeine again...the bad news is that meant my thoughts of staying off for good went flying out the window as I left his office obsessed with the thought of a Splenda-sweetened tea over crushed ice from Chic-Fil-A (followed later that afternoon by an ice cold Diet Coke in a glass bottle...YUM!). I am committed to moderation with caffeine and eventually giving it up, but frankly, I am tired and just not willing to do the work necessary to stay off it completely right now.

The really good news is that I also had my annual echocardiogram last week and today received the best report on my heart in three years. My ejection fraction, which was at fatal levels (10-15%) in May of 2004 is completely back to normal. There is no scientific explanation why, but women with cardiomyopathies like mine either die from it (30%), live but never fully regain their heart function (30%) or recover fully (30%). It seems I am in the "fully recovered" category now. Praise God!

The really, really good news is the thing my hubby and my cardiologist were most concerned with lately, my mitral valve prolapse with moderate regurge, looks a lot better as well. This means any talk of maybe having a valve replaced one day is over for now.

I am still on two cardiac medications that I will take for the rest of my life...but compared to all the other possible outcomes, those 3 pills a day are an afterthought.

I have no idea why God chose to not only spare me, but heal me completely while others far "better" than me have different outcomes. I decided a couple of years ago to stop obsessing over that question. It is a moot point. I won't know the answer on this side of heaven. I must simply strive to do what we are ALL called to do (near death experiences or not), which is live a life that glorifies our creator. So today, I will simply praise the one who saved my soul and spared my life on this Earth for now. To God be all the glory and the honor and the praise!