Entering In

I am relishing the simplicity this break has allowed. My children have a 3 1/2 week long Christmas vacation, with Daddy working most of it. Looking for adventure that would keep us from climbing the walls at home with pre-Christmas energy, the children & I loaded up the car last week and traveled to visit friends in the Charlotte, NC area. It was a wonderful three day trip.

We made our base camp at my beloved college roommate Suzanne's home and spent half days with my dear high school friend, Jill & my precious post-college friend, Sandy. Because we live five hours away it is a rare treat to have a block of time to catch up and simply do life together. To see our children developing their own relationships with one another was an added treasure.

As I was driving back to Georgia, I decided that my favorite part of the trip was seeing these women that I adore in their homes. Although we keep in touch, it was a gift to my heart to see them in their daily environments, to meet some of the people they interact with and to get a real insight into their life. Because I knew them best as teenagers, sorority sisters and single, post-college playmates, it was a treat to see them now in their roles as mothers, friends, neighbors.

Although time and miles separate us, the brief visits provided precious bonding. My friends graciously allowed me to enter in...to their after school carline, their grocery stores, their places of business, their church and neighborhood functions, their homes.

In the spirit of Advent, it served as a striking reminder why it mattered that Jesus came to live among people on this Earth. Clearly the sacrifice of His life was the ultimate reason for His coming, but I can't help but think about the comfort it brings knowing He has walked in the shoes (or sandals as it were) of humanity. He loved us enough to make the trip and enter our world.

He was God. He was Holy. He was without sin. But He was also a human who walked this Earth for 33 years. He was a brother, a son, a neighbor, a citizen, a worker. He had feelings, family & friendships.

He was busy. He got tired. He was hungry. He was tempted. He lost friends. He got angry. He wept. He was rejected. He experienced betrayal. He felt pain.

Sometimes it is helpful to remember that He is not as far away as our circumstances or misconceptions of Him can cause us to feel.  

We don’t have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He’s been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let’s walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help. Hebrews 4:15-16 (The Message)

Fools for Love

It is a story most women know all too well.

It started last week with a mammogram that led to a ultrasound and resulted in a biopsy and another mammogram--all in the span of 4 hours. The initial path report looked favorable. Surgery was scheduled.

This afternoon a sweet friend of mine had a mass removed from one of her breasts. The outcome continues to look positive, but the experience has been unsettling...not faith rattling, just nerve wracking. The situation was intensified by the fact that her next door neighbor (a Mama of five) succumbed to breast cancer less than two weeks ago. Emotions were high.

My precious friend loves the people in her life well. She is an encouraging cheerleader, big on celebration and loving with all she's got. So, a group of women in her life asked: What would SHE do if WE were the ones with the fear and the lump?

The answer was whimsical encouragement in the form of balloons...held by cheering friends...in broad daylight...on busy street corners along the route between her house and the hospital. The goal was to send her into the experience knowing she was prayed for, cared about and cheered on.

We prayed at her house, gave hugs and well wishes before scattering around town to our stations. As I stood alone on my corner waiting for her to arrive I cringed. Drawing attention to myself like this is not my forte. I wanted to hide, but thinking about my friend having something to giggle about instead of worry made me stay. Even as a middle aged woman there is something to be said for being a fool for love. 

A friend and I mulled whether we were a bit over-the-top. We acknowledged that we were, but wholeheartedly agreed if we are going to be lavish, we want it to be with encouragement. If we are going to push the limits of cultural norms, we want it to be friendship. If we are going to be extravagant, may it be in love.

Reflecting later, we all agreed that the sunshine, the solo time waiting and thinking about our friend--even the honks and the puzzled looks by those passing by us in their cars--were the best way to spend our morning. It's hard to worry and fret about worst case scenarios when you are holding bright balloons in the sunshine! The laughter and energy committed to lifting up someone we loved were just as encouraging to us as they were to our friend.

And while I used to think the older women who wear purple clothes and red hats had taken it a bit too far...I am starting to come around to their way of thinking. Life's too short to waste much time trying to look cool.

This journey can be hard. Let's love one another with all we've got!

Women in My Circle

I received this in an e-mail and couldn't help but post it here. I certainly have found this to be true in my own life. Thank you, Lord, for the precious gift of friendship.

Women in My Circle

When I was little, I used to believe in the concept of one best friend,
And then I started to become a woman.
I found out that if you allow your heart to open up God would show you the best in many friends.

One friend is needed when you're going through things with your man.
Another friend is needed when you're going through things with your mom.
Another will sit beside you in the bleachers as you delight in your children and their activities...
Another when you want to shop, share, heal, hurt, joke, or just be.
One friend will say, 'Let's cry together,'
Another , 'Let's fight together,'
Another , 'Let's walk away together.'
One friend will meet your spiritual need,
Another your jacket fetish,
Another your love for movies,
Another will be with you in your season of confusion,
Another will be your clarifier,
Another the wind beneath your wings.

But whatever their assignment in your life,
On whatever the occasion,
On whatever the day,
Or wherever you need them to meet you with their gym shoes on and hair pulled back,
Or to hold you back from making a complete fool of yourself

Those are your best friends.

It may all be wrapped up in one woman, but for many, it's wrapped up in several.
One from 7th grade,
One from high school,
Several from the college years,
A couple from old jobs,
On some days your mother,
On some days your neighbor,
On others, your sisters,
And on some days, your daughters.
~Author Unknown (despite a vigorous Internet search) If you happen to have the name let me know. I would love to attribute it to someone!

So far, my K is quite the little sanguine floating freely without a 'best friend.' I hope as she grows I can help her embrace this truth: finding the best in many different friends.

What a beautiful reminder of the different parts we play in the body of Christ!

Disco Party

Who knew a costume party could be such a family affair? P & K were mesmerized by the wigs and had a lot of fun trying them on yesterday.
K was especially interesed in watching me get ready--the false eyelashes fascinated her. While I was getting ready she was giggling in the bathroom. I came out to find her dressed as a bit of a disco diva herself in a mixture of our costumes.

The other costumes were hysterical. Everyone had fun with the them and went all out in their selections. From sideburns to 'staches and lots of chest hair-- many of the men were unrecognizable. Feathered hair, glitter, wigs and platform shoes abounded among the ladies. The most talked about item was a pair of platform shoes that were clear with goldfish in them!

Seriously.

Welcomed Visitors

We had a great few days of company. Friday was family. Saturday morning it was two of my oldest, dearest friends from high school and their families. It was so nice to be together with our children--and strange for me that mine were the oldest! The visit was not nearly as chaotic as you would expect with six under six years old. (Or maybe I am just accustomed to chaos...) The new drums certainly made for a very noisy visit!
Sunday it was an afternoon with Amy Beth. She is a breath of fresh air--and so remarkably responsible, mature and generous for her age. I am challenged each time I am around her.

Monday we had a break in the action, but Tuesday brought two of my closest college friends and their children. This time my children were the youngest!

As I looked at this picture it occurred to me that all those precious people lining the sofa came from three girls who spent their senior year sharing a room in Phi Mu house in Tuscaloosa 14 years ago.

I got tickled thinking about our responses back then had you shown us this photo as a sneak peek into our future. Our responses probably would have been something akin to the HOWLING that happened as we took these silly pictures with our children last night.



My children thoroughly enjoyed being hosts these last few days...manning their entry post at the front window, telling the 'little kids' the rules, shenanigans with the big kids and showing all of their new gifts. I loved having so many people I love from different chapters of my life in my home making memories with another generation of our families.

And I honestly was a Mary--not a Martha--enjoying time with dear friends in front of the fire, instead of rushing around. Everyone was fed, but more importantly, we were all loved on and connected with. It was a nice feeling.

Thank you, God, for friendship.

Rockettes and Roll Tide

What an amazing day in the big city! Our morning started with snow flurries as we were loading the car. (The children danced around with their tongues hanging out to catch a few flakes.) We drove to Atlanta for breakfast at the Flying Biscuit followed by the Rockettes' Christmas Spectacular at the Fox Theater with Grandmother and Granddaddy Scott.

We then journeyed on to the SEC fanfare celebration with the children. (Please admire their motley combination of Christmas-y theater attire and game day wear...)

We met one of my dearest friends(well, two...her husband counts) and then set out for the game. My in-laws were amazing to host us for the Rockettes then care for the children while we went to the game.

Amazing game and,more importantly, incredible times with people I adore. There is really nothing like being with people you have strong history with. I am going to bed with a very full heart!

Extravagant Love

Yesterday morning our precious friends, the Sweeneys, left their cozy home in the darkness of 5am for a journey back to Houston's famed MD Anderson. Monday Sweeney will begin a grueling cancer treatment regimen that involves tearing down his immune system in order to rebuild it with turbo-charged versions of his own cancer fighting cells. He will be isolated to protect him from the slightest germs which could be devastating. This process will be followed by high dose IL2 (which, for the record, is much more grueling in real life than on Grey's Anatomy) and chemotherapy.

My amazing friend, Cabell, will sit by his bedside watching and praying and loving him through his illness.

This treatment, although more effective than chemo and recommended by all the national experts who were consulted, was not covered by insurance. Our friend, a Young Life missionary, had to have $200,000 in cash ($120,000 up front) in order to begin the treatment. Because we serve an incredible God, $230,000 was raised online through word of mouth in only 3 weeks time. Read that again...$230 THOUSAND in 21 days...that's over $10,000 per day.

Truly, extravagant love.

Sweeney was quarantined the last week, so we couldn't really 'see' them before they left. Cabell made arrangements for a little surprise for a few of her friends in her absence. We had special instructions to go TOGETHER to her back porch. Because the five of us have 15 children between us, it was decided Saturday morning at 7am would be the easiest time for us to pull off.

Armed with coffee, baseball caps and make-up free faces we met this foggy morning with the bittersweet realization that we were going to our friend's home and she wouldn't be there. While we were enjoying being together, she was several states away gearing up for a life or death fight with her husband against stage IV metastatic melanoma.

We were greeted by a brightly colored note of sweet thanks for our support stuck to her back door. (And yes, we were already teary at this point.) There were instructions to get a cleverly hidden key and go into her dining room. There she had prepared a glorious, festive Christmas table. Each place setting was hand-painted by Cabell, personalized with patterns, designs, initials and names unique to each of us. And there was another note...telling us where each of our 9 other place settings were boxed up.


My first thought was: "Seriously? This is too much!" I thought of the countless hours it must have taken her to prepare this. The hours she spent painting, firing, packing, preparing. How many weeks must she have been secretly conspiring to blow us away with this gift?

And then I thought of what I know to be true of my friend. She LOVES creating, giving, surprising. No one forced her to do this. Her extravagant surprise was because she loves us and WANTED to do it.

It is a trait she got from her Father. He, too, longs to give good gifts to His children. I love that from the moment sin entered our world way back in Genesis, He was at work with His Plan to restore us through the gift of His Son.What joy He must have had as He thought through the logistics...a young, unknown girl...a simple carpenter...a stable...a star. They'll never expect this.I am about to blow them away.

Extravagant love. Undeserved, unexpected, lavishness from a heart full of love.

I tend to be much more practical. Just the word 'extravagant' makes my chest tighten a little. Then I think about the way Jesus reacted to the extravagance of Mary of Bethany. I think of the extravagance of His Grace.

I am still trying to understand what this looks like in 'real life.' But walking through this difficult season with close friends has taught me a lot. The one thing that seems most needed in this situation is absolutely out of my hands. I cannot cure my friend's illness. All I can do is love them with the love of God through the process. I am helpless. God is not.

After we squealed and oohed and ahhed we talked about all the ideas we had for loving them back. Then we started with the best one we could think of--sitting crossed legged in their living room floor begging the Spirit to intercede. We prayed the lavish love of our Father would continue to be poured out on them as they were in Houston and thanked God, in advance, for the way they would impact the doctors, nurses and patients they would encounter.

Lord, may it not take such difficult, heart-wrenching circumstances for me to be one who loves others extravagantly!

"Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other." John 13:34-35(MSG)

Fonder

For the last 60 hours I have been free from the things that typically dominate my days. I haven't washed a dish or an article of clothing. I did not cook a single thing, nor did I wipe any one else's body parts. I did not step on or put away any toys. I was not responsible for anyone but myself.

Instead, I slept (10 hours the first night, 9 the next) without interruption. I ate fabulous food someone else prepared. I shopped for great deals at an outlet mall. I did 4 Beth Moore assignments and read fiction! (The Help by Kathryn Stockton) I watched a whole football game (second half on the beach just before sunset). I enjoyed champagne in a spa hot tub before a facial (thanks for the gift, sweet D!) And through it all I was surrounded by precious friends who called me "Jen" instead of Mommy.

We laughed a lot, cried a little, listened intently and counselled lovingly. We shared iphone apps, pictures of our 10 combined growing children, prayer concerns and stories. We reminisced about college days and each discovery that we were pregnant.

By the time this afternoon arrived we were all rejuvenated, refreshed, encouraged and REALLY MISSING the very things we had felt we needed a break from days before. As we dropped E off at her home in Birmingham her reunion with her family left me longing for my own. After a couple of additional hours of driving, I arrived home tonight and almost tackled my husband with a hug. I climbed into bed with each of my sleeping children to smell their hair and remind them how very much they were loved.

Breaks from the hectic pace of life are fantastic. Returning home refreshed and ready for the ones you love is even better!

The Gift of Friendship

As I type I am in my pjs sitting on a screened in porch at the beach. A cool breeze is blowing, candles are lit, Jack Johnson is playing and I am surrounded by three of my best friends since college.

We have spent the day together. We met in Birmingham and enjoyed an outdoor brunch before heading to Florida. Our four hour drive allowed for lots of catching up. Somewhere along the way we found our spontaneous college girl selves, (you know the ones who didn't have 4 husbands and 10 children between them?) In a sudden burst of spontaneity we considered bagging the beach for a shot at attending tomorrow's Alabama/Tennessee game. After one of the husband's brought us back to reality, proclaiming, "Ya'll are idiots" we decided to stick with our original plan. We arrived in time to have a dinner by sunset and more conversation.

We have covered a lot of ground so far...kids, marriage, extended family, friends, foibles, faith, challenges...and I have realized that friendships are all the more richer the more life you have under your belt. Like a fine wine, some things truly get better with age.

I am so thankful for these women. One I met as my next door neighbor in my freshman dorm. The other two were pledge sisters of mine who intimidated me greatly as a timid 17 year old college freshman. S with her confident, loud laugh that attracted people to her and D, the beauty queen, college cheerleader. Only God knew way back then what they would add to my life over the years.

Isn't it awesome that we get to do this journey of life together?

And HUGE thanks for my husband who gave me the gift of this weekend. After a very long week of work he is holding down the fort and managing my trio at home until I return. Thank you! I know what a treasure I have in you!

Puppy Love

The only thing better than getting a cute cuddly puppy is for your neighbor to get one. (All the fun, none of the responsibility)
K thoroughly enjoyed fuzzy 'Tucker' today with her friends M & S. Our neighbor enjoyed having a worn out puppy who slept very well this afternoon!

Summer Fun

Over the last several days the children have enjoyed quality time with sweet friends. After a picnic in 93 degree weather...

We wised up and made the next play date indoors.
(I will be so sad when they outgrow dressing up.)

And today we had a fun time painting with Cabell. What a treat! And yet, when she started reading Shel Silverstein, they abandoned their projects in favor of snuggling close. Within a couple of minutes they had all made their way into her lap--where they stayed for almost an hour.I love the easy pace of Summer and the quality time it allows!!

P.S. Did you notice K's outfit in the top photo. I have entered the world of budding fashion sense...We are using the Summer to (hopefully) work out some kinks. I was so proud of myself this particular day because the children all went to Kindermusik camp in very 'creative' outfits. The control freak in me was twitching, but I kept my mouth shut. Imagine the chuckle I had at my own expense when they came home with keepsake photos from camp...taken that day.

What a fun lesson for me to realize that it honestly makes the memory much more enjoyable than if they had been cute and matching!

Roadtrip to Nashville

I met my husband about three hours before I met his (now our) friends Tom & Laura. We 'ran into them' a few hours into our first blind date 11 years ago. Although in retrospect, it was certainly no accident. They were on our second date as well and have been great friends to us as a couple ever since.

When we moved to the town we now live in after my husband's training, they moved here one month later for Tom's job. We had three great years together here before they moved to Nashville. Those years included the birth of our triplets and their son--within two weeks of each other--and the baptism of their daughter (our goddaughter). Although we have seen them a couple of times as they were passing through our town, this weekend was our first trip to see them.

These two pictures were taken using my cell phone--only 5 minutes elapsed between them.
Unfortunately, we were only 15 minutes from Tom & Laura's when they all fell asleep. Their little rejuvenating nap combined with their first real experience with a sleepover meant they did not fall asleep until 11 pm Friday night!! That is a full two hours past the latest they have previously stayed up. Unfortunately, it did not translate into sleeping in...so this was the scene only 9 hours later.
Except for sweet P, who climbed into a handicapped accessible swing at the neighborhood park and caught a little cat nap.
The others went strong all day.

Nothing could make my R happier than a water gun as big as he is...and an endless supply of water balloons. (The poor Daddies spent over an hour filling them for a few precious minutes of fun.)
And once P caught a few winks he was right back in the middle of the action as well.
By the way, this is my new favorite sibling relationship picture...it really sums up K & P!

After working hard to wear out the children all day, we entrusted them to the care of a brave sitter and went out for a fabulous dinner followed by the CMA Fanfest Concert featuring lots of very talented people like Lee Ann Womack, Trace Adkins, Wynonna (and her special guest Naomi!!), and Martina McBride. Can I digress for a moment to mention that Wynonna and Martina have some pipes--good grief they can sing!!

It was a late night double date like the old days...except these days a 1am bedtime didn't negate a 6am wake up from precious children. :-)

I think we will all sleep well tonight!

Windy Gap 2009

This year, I got the best Mother's day present I could hope for...a weekend away investing in my sweet family. (What a bonus to have my good friend, Suzanne, and her crew there as well!)

The setting, just outside of Asheville, was picturesque. But for an hour long thunderstorm, conveniently timed for much-needed naps, even the weather cooperated.
There were countless activities to enjoy. We participated in frisbee throwing, basketball, foursquare, competitive family games and 'pony rides' (P rode the largest horse I have ever seen, by the way).

There was swimming, a huge water slide and zip line into the lake (which we did not do), even beach volleyball. R, predictably, enjoyed the competitive sports while K & P (heads in foreground) spent hours playing in the sand.

Best of all, was quality playtime with Daddy with no pager, and no Internet or telephone access.
The smiles on everyone's faces were all the proof I needed that the weekend was a hit. We danced. We sang. We caught worms and bugs. We got really dirty. We played air hockey and ping pong. We laughed (a lot).

While the adults got to hear from an insightful guest speaker (singer/songwriter, Allen Levi) at various times throughout the weekend, our children were entertained by awesome college students.
This is its own special ministry, by the way, allowing preschoolers to incorporate you into their sidewalk chalk mural!
And as our children sat in the club room and sang silly songs followed by lyrics reminding them of God's incredible love, I could not help but shake my head and smile at the crazy way God weaves our lives. Nineteen years ago, I was a hyperactive, over-permed teenaged girl who didn't have a clue what God had in store for my life. I sat on those very same stairs and sang many of those very same songs.

What a kick to think of how then-me would have reacted to a glimpse forward to now-me! Can you imagine?? (Triplets! Like, O.M.G!!!)

How thankful I am for those who invested in ministering to me back then. How committed it makes me to paying it forward to the lives of those sitting in those spots as teenagers today. Have you thanked anyone in youth ministry lately? (I know many who read this blog are in some way involved. How thankful I am for you!)

But for the insanely dirty laundry I must deal with, tonight I am thankful and contemplative. I am content. I am blessed.

I can't wait to share more about the message of the weekend. It was incredible, but this tired brain cannot do it justice tonight.

Home Again!

We are home.



The rain finally stopped late yesterday allowing for a couple of hours on the beach and an evening adventure at Baytowne Wharf. We had gorgeous travel weather today for the 9 hour trek with 10 passengers. I was seated on the back row, surrounded by children...so tonight I am anxious for hot tea and adult conversation.


I have a new appreciation for the fun of life with boys, the sweetness of life with girls and the importance of having good Daddies. After days indoors, I also have a renewed appreciation for sunshine, fresh air and the ability to play outdoors!

I have piles to go before I sleep, so pictures will have to suffice for tonight. I'll post more tomorrow once everyone is safely tucked away in school and a few bags are unpacked, errands run and bills paid.