Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Girlfriends

I have to admit I used to wrinkle my nose at items bearing the silly slogan, "Thank God for girlfriends." It is not that I did not have good friends, I was blessed with a wonderful group of friends in high school (male and female), many of whom I still speak with regularly. College brought a new group of precious friends, a handful of whom I am still close to. Various points of my life have been seriously impacted by the people in my inner circle of friends. I just never realized how essential community would become to my mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.

When everyone started marrying off, I mourned the loss of my male friendships as I had known them. Oh, no, I thought. Now its just us girls...and we can be so complicated! My guy friends never had all the answers, but at least they were straightforward and easy to read.

As I entered fully into adulthood, it didn't take long for me to grow to appreciate the beautiful bond of women. In the last year or so I have grown to appreciate the amazing gift of true, good friends. The friends you can be 100% real with. You can share your heart without fear of judgment or betrayal. They pray for your children and you do theirs. They show up on your doorstep with the perfect little 'happy' when you need it the most. Rather than laugh at your fears, they nod understandingly and share their own.

From broken hearts to bad haircut experiences and C-section scars--we are a sisterhood. We get each other. From my late afternoon conversation with my mother-in-law to tonight's late night heart to heart with my 22 year old babysitter, I feel strangely linked to the sewing circles of old. It is universal to want to share this experience with women who have gone before you, those coming behind and the rare breed right in the thick of it with you.

After VBS today one of my college roommates, who now resides in Charlotte, came for an afternoon visit with her three sons. The visit was chaotic with 6 children involved, but just being with her was a comfortable balm for my soul.

Tonight I was blessed by a dinner with a dozen women from my Tuesday morning Bible Study. The group has been meeting for 6 years, I have been a part of it for 4. We don't meet weekly during the Summer, so a chance to 'check in' is a rare treat. As we sat around over a glass of wine and shared our true hearts and our raw struggles, I couldn't help but be overcome with thankfulness.

I moved to our town almost 5 years ago knowing NO ONE--and have been blessed beyond belief with a community of incredible women. I cannot fathom doing marriage, parenthood, ministry, life without the camaraderie, encouragement, support and friendship of great women.

I love this, from CS Lewis, "Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: 'What! You, too? Thought I was the only one.'"

9 comments:

Stacey said...

I loved that you shared this, especially as I have had to recently leave my dearest girlfriends a few hours away. I have played around with a post about girlfriends, but always question if I will do them all justice. But then I read yours and totally get what you are saying; so I know any girl that reads mine will too!

Here here to girlfriends!

elizabeth said...

I wish I could have been there!! I'm just so busy with work and getting everything ready for our vacation, that I just didn't have the time. After reading this post, I was SO jealous that I couldn't be a part of it.

I love our group of women, and you are such a blessing in my life through that group. Thank you for being you..my friend and fellow sister, sharing this journey together.

E

Cheri (aka "The Mom Lady") said...

I am especially fond of my Christian sisters - together we help look out for each other's children, cook for each other when one is ill or having surgery, learn from the older,wiser ones, counsel the younger ones, give each other shoulders to cry on, plan wedding, funerals, senior banquets, prom alternatives, fellowship dinners, anniversary receptions, baby showers, wedding showers...it goes on and on. And when one of us loses a loved one, we move in to close the circle.

I've always felt like girlfriends were the family you could choose. Living overseas for many years, I quickly found my niche of women (especially with husbands out of town or offshore often) and together we forged ahead!

Erin said...

I am about to take off for a weekend away with one of my very best girlfriends! This post was the perfect prelude to our weekend!! Thanks for sharing your heart! Amen to all you said!

HW said...

Girlfriends are the best!
When mine were little, we met every Tuesday for Bible Study and then lunch at McDonald's where our children played together. Now, my kids are in high school with some of those same children and it is so sweet to remember their history.

I also used to go for Ladies Night Out about once a month.

However, it seems that as the children grow older and busier, the time for girlfriends is much more limited for all of us. I regret letting that slip away; but sometimes it is too tiring to "work it in." Then when I see one of them I tell myself "I have to get us all together again..."

And I need to follow through, because it is such a precious thing - friendship.

Mom of Eleven said...

So sad I had to miss last night, I feel the same way you do. I posted about this a while back, and I totally agree with all of your thoughts on friendship.
w

Kelly said...

I loved this!
In high school through my single life - I had a ton of close guy friends and always thought I would miss that when I got married. But I don't for a minute. Instead - I long to spend time with girls as often as possible. Marriage is wonderful but sometimes husbands just don't "get" everything that my friends do! Especially all of the things us women go through! Girlfriends are a TRUE blessing!

Totallyscrappy said...

AMEN!
Soon my family will be moving to another state and I have already begun praying that God provide me with beautiful friends!

Christi said...

I know exactly how you feel! I am blessed with 3 wonderful friends, and on a day to day basis wonder what I would do without them. We are indeed a sisterhood, women walking along the same path in this season of our lives.

Thanks for sharing your heart!