May

The proverbial winds of change are palpable in my home these days.

The celebrations of the middle school 'lasts' have begun. All three of my children have wrapped up the final Spring sports. The Spring play is complete. High school registration has begun.

In the next 3 weeks, my trio will graduate from middle school, turn 15, test for learners' permits and begin their whirlwind of Summer experiences.

Next month, our foster child is scheduled to be reunified with her biological family after a year in our home.

I realized today that I have created 4 different calendars--on my phone, in a binder, on my refrigerator and in a countdown app to mark the time--as if somehow re-writing it is walking me through heart preparations and making it all more real.

I suppose in some ways it is a non-traditional prayer--a meditation of sorts on what is coming. As I write, I surrender the future to the One I believe holds it all together.

I want desperately to navigate the waters of all these transitions well--for myself and for the hearts entrusted to my care. As much as I am inclined to verbally process, I am trying to spend time being quiet. I want to listen to the Lord and allow Him to tend my heart and guide me in how to love my husband, my three individual bio children and our foster child well.

He has spoken to me most recently through Matthew 6:34 in the Message translation:

  “Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes."


So much is coming...even as I type in my quiet kitchen I think I can faintly hear the rumbling of the herd of milestones in the distance. 

I am absolutely expectant but committed to not taking my attention off the lessons, joys and needs of today. Keep me focused, Lord.