My husband and trio have never been to Tuscaloosa, nor have we ever managed to get all 18 of us together. We tailgated Friday night on the Quad with Dreamland Ribs before the pep rally and bonfire. 
Saturday we tailgated again from 11am-4pm--strolled around campus, enjoyed the parade 
and even went back to the Phi Mu house to show the kiddos the rooms we once shared. Kickoff was too late for my children, so we got them squared away with a sitter and attended the game against Ole Miss. It took coordination, but we pulled it off--and now there is talk of making it an annual event.
It was a strange thing to go back after 14 years away. (I have only been to postseason games since I left--so I walked back into a town I have not seen since the year after graduation.) At times it was hard to recognize. A lot has changed in 14 years. On campus it is evident, new buildings, new businesses, upgraded landscapes and OH MY at that stadium....
The changes in me were probably just as dramatic--even though not as outwardly noticeable. There have certainly been demolitions, upgrades, renovations, and new construction in my life and heart since I left that place. I was only 21. That seems like a lifetime ago.
To revisit a place where so much life happened with the people you shared that pivotal season with--but also with the people God has put in our lives since then was a bit strange.
Worlds colliding.
I dreamed about and prayed for my hubby (without knowing who he was) with those girls in that place so long ago. My three amigas all married their high school sweethearts, so I knew them well during our college years, but to see them again as Daddies back in our old stomping grounds was a bit surreal. Being in the sorority house was probably the most nostalgic. Every corner held a memory of a conversation, silliness, a photo I have in my attic, a heartbreak. I even had a flashback of watching the Waco, TX tragedy and the OJ verdict unfold on TV...and the day Isabella died on Days of our Lives. (MUCH has changed about my priorities since then :-) Notably, there is not a single picture of the 4 of us together, much less a large group picture. As is the nature of our lives in this season, we were mothers first.
Honestly, I felt every bit of my almost 36 years. But as I looked around at the gorgeous undergraduate girls flirting and fidgeting, I did not want their station in life. Their wrinkle free faces, maybe :-) but not at the expense of the smiles, laughter, worries and sunshiny days that have led to those deep lines on my face. They felt a bit like badges of honor. I have earned them.
I won't have that skin again--but I am comfortable in the skin I am in. Finally.
6 comments:
I have a question for you: What is your view on drinking around your children? What got me thinking about this was, I saw in the picture with one of your sons, you had a beverage in your hands that could have been beer (for all I know it was just apple juice!). What it actually is, does not matter to me, I am just curious on your views of drinking around your children? And I am not talking getting drunk, just simply drinking a drink or two. I am twenty and I drank alcohol before I had my son, but now that I am a mother I am not drinking until I am legal, which is not that far away. I hope this does not offend you, but I read your blog and you are so wise, so I'd love to hear your take on it!
My first thought was that I would write another post on that subject, but I am not sure I am ready to take it on... ;-)
The short answer is I do occasionally have a drink in front of my children, but always in moderation and we have talked about 'grown up drinks' / alcohol am the reasons why you have to be 21 to purchase/consume. "they can make your head fuzzy and your choices poor. You have to be an adult so you can think through the consequences and use self control."
At 6 this answer suffices!
I live in Birmingham, so pretty much every Saturday that Alabama is playing a home game I find myself in Tuscaloosa. A privilege that I don't take for granted after living the first few years out of college in Atlanta!
I would have loved to have wandered by your little tailgate and met your kids. I'm sure a little odd for you, but oh so fun. Glad all of you were able to enjoy time back on the campus. My roommate from freshman years was a Phi Mu. We've stayed really close and when Iw as in college, I often found myself sitting in some of those places you described...just studying on different computers in the attic, watching grey's anatomy and making countless homecoming queen flyers. I knew she and her friends would love reading about your days at the house, so I passed along this post.
Thanks for sharing and ROLL TIDE!!
Jennifer, Love your last sentence, isn't it a great feeling? to be comfortable in your own skin? I am so thankful I, too, have come to the place in my life where it is completely fine with me to not have it all figured out. Instead, to be content with knowing He has me right where He wants me. Pruning taking place daily, but oh, how He loves me! Thanks for writing.
Oh JMom, you made my heart smile. This weekend I will reconnect with 3 lovely souls I went to A&M with and lived with these girls for 2 years. I have been in all their weddings and knew all their husbands b/c they each dated them while we were at A&M. I have been the lone single girl who just last week got ENGAGED! This weekend will have many nostalgic moments, one girl has 3 kiddos, one has 2, one has lived out of state and the country and she is flying in. We are like girls getting ready for a sleepover and ready for some fun times and hard laughs with a few more lines on our face. They are thrilled my fiance proposed before the reunion so we can chat about wedding plans. I may shed some tears b/c this season of my life has been covered in prayers a long long time. GLad you and your girlfriends make it a point to get together. This weekend may become an annual one for all of us! Blessings and have a fantastic week!
Ashley
Oh, I had to chuckle at "wrinkle free faces." Great observation! And hey -- I was a Phi Mu too, about the same time (at UGA). Thanks for writing!
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