My husband has also been laboring away this weekend. He is the trauma surgeon on call Friday-Tuesday morning. He went in to work at 1:30 this morning and returned around lunch time today. While he napped, my parents and I attempted to keep the children quiet (which meant going outside).
My Mom and Dad were such good sports to assist me in cleaning out the garage. That is true love...driving 5 1/2hours round trip to clean your adult daughter's filthy garage!
While we swept and de-spidered, the children were assigned to rinse out the dog kennel. I heard lots of giggling, but didn't investigate much--I needed to maximize my window of opportunity for trashing cheap and broken plastic toys. When I heard them calling the dog, I looked over to find the source of their laughter.
It seems they had created a doggie bubble bath for Haley--inside her kennel. They were so proud, but she was not really interested.
We are all about putting the LABOR back in Labor Day around here. Well, except for P. He was off enjoying a little leisure. That is much more his speed. He loves life and enjoys it to the full--with the exception of work. While K & R are thrilled to be helpers, P is just not interested. Unfortunately, even rewards don't help much. He is not wired to be very competitive, so he even sees right through attempts to turn it into a game.He has so many other fantastic qualities as a Type B personality. I don't necessarily want to 'change his stripes,' but I do believe in the value of learning to work with all your heart. Do any of you have experience with children who do not have work ethic as a gift? I am wondering if that is something you can teach.
6 comments:
My daughter is one who when she helps, she helps with all her body, mind and soul. But if she doesn't want to help, she is a stubborn mule. I'm not proud to say that we have now started to institute the marble system. Since she is working on "Kinderbucks" at school, we are doing something of a similar nature. I know that you work some system with the kids. If you chores, you earn a marble for each chore. (Begging to have it done is not a marble earning adventure.) Doing something thoughtful and respectful can earn you a surprise marble. (Our daughter has been suffering from self-centeredness lately.) She earned a surprise marble for taking off her painty shoes at the door before coming in. She normally bolts through the house with shoes on, which normally isn't an issue, but I was surprised and pleased that she thought about NOT wearing her funky paint shoes into our home. We're trying to reinforce things. The difficulty that I suffer from (I know that you have touched on this in previous posts) is that as much as you want them to help, sometimes it would be just faster and easier to do it yourself. However, we aren't teaching them good things by handling it all for them. So, since we work and get paid for it, I figure that it'll work for her, too. I understand that I'm working with 10 marbles earns a dollar, but at this point, she doesn't know the value and the notion of marble earning is more valuable than the cash. Yes, I realize that this won't last long.
Good luck.
oh i can't wait to come back and read your commenter's thoughts. my 2 year old can spin circles around my 5 year old when it comes to cleaning up or organizing.
hope your hubby gets some rest...your parents are a blessing! sounds like something my mom would do for her adult daughter!
I have one of those...my sweet son is just not interested in chores for the most part, unless a reward or begging or my getting frustrated or his little sister jumping to do the task for him is involved. I am also interested in any and all thoughts on this. I pray for his work ethic to grow. I pray for a happy heart to develop in helping others...
One of my grown sons never really did develop a great work ethic. But I will tell you this, HE is the one who greets every person when he walks in a room. He calls them by name and gives the ladies a hug. He sits and talks with his nanny and he loves his wife dearly. I am proud of him. (Course getting the yard mowed weekly is still a chore!:))!!
One of mine (F) is often the one lingering behind when its time to do work. He even made the mistake of telling my husband (as he was supposed to be taking sticks to the edge of the yard) that he was "allergic to work." My hubby appropriately replied that he would be receiving daily vaccinations to help him get over his ailment. We've had conversations about whatever you do-do it as you are serving unto the Lord, being a team, the hardworking ant, how hardworking Matt and I both are, etc---but what seems to have the most effective result is if you complain/lolly gag doing responsibility time/jobs---you get to have MORE jobs. Ive certainly seen a change in his willingness to get over himself and join in. Hopefully (prayerfully) this will integrated into a man of strong character.
So impressed with y'alls progress for the day! That's a HUGE accomplishment!
I love what Love Being A Nonny said about her child not excelling in work, but being very hospitable. We do need both, but sometimes I forget that we have different strengths.
What I have done with my children (mostly grown now) is that when I give them a pay job (mowing the lawn, etc.) I will pay them for it if they do it without me asking when it needs to be done, or do it the first time I ask. If I have to ask more than once, they still do it but they don't get paid. Most of my children now see things that need doing and do it without being told, pay or not. It also helps just having them grow up!
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