When my children were just babies I would often use the precious last few minutes of my babysitter/errand time to escape to a small shopping area downtown for mindless window shopping. One of the stores I visited was a stationery and gifts boutique. I really enjoy beautiful papers, so I always enjoyed seeing the latest products they carried. One day the woman in the store giggled when I walked in and proudly showed me a pad she had printed as a sample. Across the top it had my name. On the bottom it said "Best Intentions."
I must confess that I did not think it was funny. It actually hurt my feelings and offended me a little. What exactly was that supposed to mean? I wondered. Was she implying I am never able to measure up to my intentions? I thought I was doing a fairly good job holding it all together and meeting my commitments despite having 3 babies.
I actually pondered it all for far longer than I should have. It felt somewhat akin to the old Southern phrase, "Bless her heart" which is frequently used to soften the blow of an insult. As much as I wish I were above it and too mature to care, the truth was that I was offended. Pride and the need to 'have it together' are Achilles heels for me. She had touched on a sensitive spot!
The store closed. I found a new favorite stationery boutique and I forgot about that silly pad--until a couple of weeks ago when a friend from church came to me with a gift bag during Wednesday night supper. It was well before my birthday so I was puzzled. She told me she had just started working for the woman who had reopened that old store. While cleaning up the old inventory she had found this pad and wondered if I had ordered it and forgotten to pick it up.
Three years later some of those old feelings reared their head...but a few years and a little more experience with not having it together prevailed. With a sense of humor I accepted the pad and put it in the console of my car as 'scrap paper.'
The joke has apparently been on me all along, as I have found myself using that pad a couple of times a week for the last month...and in almost every case, as I jot my note, I realize the sentiment 'Best Intentions' is generally right on target.
Pride can be hard to swallow. It certainly helps to keep your sense of humor.
5 comments:
i can't believe it came back to you all these years later.
i thought of you earlier as i cleaned up some spillage out of our car...how is yours smelling after the cat incident and milk vomit?!?
great post...i think pride is a tough one for a lot of us!
Funny that it said "Best Intentions" because when I think of you, I think of Intentional...with motherhood and with being a wife. I love how Intentional you parent. So, when you see that pad, think of "Best Intentional"!!!
Just a little pad? Mine would be LEGAL SIZE!
Have a great day :)
I understand how you felt the first time. A friend of mine has just started a club that we're calling the RTBO BOLOC SG club. It's not really a "club" but just a state of mind. It stands for:
I'm a
Refusing
To
Be
Offended
Big
Ole
Lump
Of
Clay
Standing
Guard
It means that we refuse to let others offend us and that are lumps of clay ripe for God to mold us into his image and that we are standing guard wearing the armor of God!
I interpet the first pad as a messiage saying: Too much looking and not enough buying. But I see everything differently than others. If everyone who looked had bought she would still be in business perhaps.
I love your blog and insites.
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