Sunday, September 28, 2008

Secret Identity

I am completely exhausted and about to go to bed, but I wanted to share this story. Yesterday we went to Athens with wonderful friends for the Alabama/Georgia game. I spent the 24 hours before our departure in a big quandry over what to wear. (Give me grace for how superficial this all sounds--just keepin' it real!) Because it was a 'blackout' game for UGA, all fans had been instructed to wear black.

I really do love the Georgia Bulldogs. As a family, we cheer for UGA. However, Alabama is my alma mater. I did not cheer for Bama before I attended school there, but we won a national championship my freshman year which made it pretty easy to convert. I have some amazing memories of school spirit and pride associated with my 4 years in Tuscaloosa.

I do not follow them very closely now, primarily because I live in a different state and there are few friends in my town who do. (Football is very social here in the South.) I haven't been to a Bama game in over 10 years--while I've atended a half dozen UGA games in that time. It is just more fun to pull for someone more mainstream than to sit home alone cheering on your folks.

With all that being said, I was committed to cheering for Bama last night, but deeply conflicted over whether to wear black with everyone else in my group--or white, as the Bama fans were doing. Both felt a little false. (And I felt VERY much like I was in high school completely succumbing to ridiculous peer pressure.)


Ultimately, I decided to wear black, despite my intentions to support Bama. As foolish as it sounds, the primary reason was to avoid the heckling on the way to and from the game from the overwhelmingly black-clad crowd. I didn't want to stand out and invite the trash talking that permeates a high stakes SEC game. I wanted to blend in.

I took a white sweater, which I donned once we reached our seats. Once the game started there was absolutely no denying my Alabama roots. Hard as I tried, I could not resist pulling for my team. I was COMPLETELY surrounded by Georgia fans who were not happy to have their ranks infiltrated by me and my white sweater--especially as Alabama took a strong lead.

I reflected all day on what the whole thing taught me about myself (beyond the football part). As I prayed about it I chuckled to God that I knew it was only a silly football game, this was not a matter of life and death...but I do think it was a revealing glimpse into how we so often try to tow the line between being in the world, but not of the world...

When the game starts and it really counts, I will boldly proclaim that my identity is in Christ. I simply can't deny it. But how often in the day to day do I attempt to 'wear black' and fly below the radar screen in the world.

And just as my heart was a bit torn yesterday--loving both worlds--the black and the white, there are things about this world I do love a little too much.

No servant can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth." Luke 16:33 (NAS)

I want to be relevant. I want to marked by love moreso than a label. Yet, I don't want to be lukewarm. It was far too easy to stuff that sweater in my bag and carefully choose when it was safe to make my identity known. I pray what happened at last night's game is not an accurate reflection of my life.

Tonight my prayer is Psalm 86:11 “Teach me your way O Lord, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.”

And Roll Tide. :-)

14 comments:

Tara said...

Amen!!! And Roll Tide. I had no idea you were UofA Alum. My husband attended for 4 years (didn't finish there though) and most of his family went and/or played there.

It is so awesome to be at a game. The energy of SEC football just can't be beat. We saw an earlier game this season and we are hoping to take our girls to see a game this year. I don't know if they are ready, but we'll find out. Roll Tide!

Michelle said...

A wonderful story. ROLL TIDE!!!! I actually thought about you last night and wondered who you would cheer for. You chose right.

AK said...

Wow what a tough position to be in! I grew up in Athens so I have no choice other than to be a loyal DAWG fan. However, I do hafta give Bama some credit for a game well played last night...not that I like it but they did do pretty well. Watch out though we'll get em next time ;).

Kate Geisen said...

Wow. I love the way you can take a story (that is interesting and entertaining on its own) and use it to illuminate something of God. You have a real gift. Have you ever read the devotionals from www.proverbs31.org? You could absolutely write for them.

Sitesx6 said...

Oh the struggles of the sin nature, going against the grain and being a secret white, when everyone else is black. :)

I so relate!
That was a great story.
Kelly S.

Brandy Thixton said...

What a sad loss for the Dawgs. My husband was there and said it was teh quietest he's ever heard the stadium.

Hey! The next time you're in the Athens area, feel free to let me know! I'd love to meet you in person! (We live minutes from campus!)

georgiamom said...

ROLL TIDE!!! I'm so glad to find someone to say that to! We won too big for me even to talk trash to our Dawg Fan friends. And I wouldn't dare rub it in to my husband who has been in a funk since the 1st quarter of the game.
That last verse was my theme verse last year. I recited it over and over. I especially used it in times like you were describing when I wasn't sure if I was being relevant or selling out.
---And I think that person is right you totally could write for proverbs31. How cool would that be?

Tales of a Peanut said...

Roll Tide! And what an amazing application of the game. You teach me something new with every post!

Mary Lou said...

I too loved the way you illustrated your feelings about the game to about not always proclaiming your Christian identity. Most of us can understand that...been there done that. I have asked Him for a new boldness in my life. As to Roll Tide..my son in law went to AL, undergrad and grad school...taught his children when they were toddlers.."what does the elephant say?" my grandson would hold up his little arm and make a motion and say "Roll Tide". They've even named the dog Allie and her middle name is Bama....alot of AL pride out there. Blessings on your week with your little ones.

Lori said...

Roll Tide Roll!

S.Good said...

ROLL TIDE ROLLLLLL

Beki said...

I read your blog often and you are always so insightful. Just wanted to let you know I really enjoyed this post. What a great eye opener for me as well. I pray my life is a true reflection of my deep love for our Father too!! Thanks for being so real!!! love your blog.

And Geaux Tigers :-)

Ann-Marie said...

You don't know me but I frequent your blog. You're an absolute wonderful writer. All I have to say is - Roll Tide! I live in Alabama with a husband who graduated from Alabama, twice. I have no choice who to pull for. And I am glad you donned your white sweater :)

Daree said...

this is my favorite blog of them all. How true! The pressure! Your reflection about being torn and giving in to the pressure. I was a little surprised that you decided to wear black i must say. Just like you are probably surprised to see me go to so many Widespread shows and blend in for the sake of others!