Saturday, July 23, 2011

Needs

Because Summer allows for so much quality time with my offspring, it also tends to shed some light on things the children & I need to work on. Our list right now is:

1. Shoe tying... (I know it is ridiculous that I still have one who hasn't mastered this. I take full responsibility. We have goal of working this out before the first day of school.)

2. I have written already quite a bit about our challenges with sitting still during 'big church.' (We are making progress!)

3. Interacting with adults (eye contact, not interrupting, etc.)

4. WHINING/Complaining! I know I am not the only parent who struggles with this. I have found myself saying A LOT this Summer, "Ask for what you need to solve that problem."

I know that seven year olds don't have the ability to always name it. But, it is a start--and I am hoping that, when applicable, it will retrain them to think about solutions not just complain about their problems.

In the last couple of days I have been reminded that there are times when we simply don't know what we need. Watching P get his new glasses (twice the strength of his previous pair) was a striking moment. As he put them on and looked around (especially once we walked outside the building) a huge smile of amazement crossed his face. His vision had diminished gradually, therefore, he didn't realize all that he was missing out on. (Sounds like seasons of my own life...)

I had the same experience last night. My husband asked me out for a date. There was no special reason and we weren't meeting up with anyone else...just the two of us. It had been far too long since we had made time for such. It wasn't until we went out that I realized how badly I had needed it. My heart exhaled the stress of so much Summer single parenting and inhaled the sweetness of unrushed, uninterrupted, unshared time with my guy. I didn't know how badly I needed it. I am so thankful my husband loves me and knows me well enough to identify and supply some of my needs--even without my asking.

I was reminded of the heart of God. It is amazing that an all-knowing God invites us to converse with Him through prayer. We are free to share our fears and desires with Him. Yet, He has searched each of our hearts and knows us. He knows what we need (and what we don't!)before and beyond what we do.

You can be sure that God will take care of everything you need, his generosity exceeding even yours in the glory that pours from Jesus. Philippians 4:19 The Message

I am not insinuating that God is a fan of whining and complaining...but I do find great comfort in the fact that his supply is not dependent on my demand.

3 comments:

HW said...

Is your non-shoe-tying child a leftie while the otheres are right handed (or vice-versa?) by any chance? My mother talks about having to teach my left handed brother differently than she taught her three right handed children. With the righties, she stood behind us so our hands would move identically to hers. With the leftie, she stood in front of him, so he could just mirror her motions.

Bailey's Leaf said...

What Will I Do If I Can't Tie My Shoe is a Scholastic book that took care of that for us. I admit that my daughter is a bunny ear tying kid, but she ties, double knots, it holds and looks just like the traditional way. I was about 98% of the way there, then MIL decided to teach her a different way and she lost it. Don't worry. It'll come with time.

Problem solving skills are being worked on at our house with our 7 year old, too.

:eye roll: Don't get me started about whining. I had started a fine system with my K-. It got her out of it for a while. For each time she whined, she owed me a dime. You remind me that perhaps I should consider reinstating.

My husband and I both find that K- tends to fall to pieces in the summer. Our daughter thrives on structure and where I structure as much as possible, it isn't as much as when she is in school. We're working on using our communication skills effectively rather than falling apart into a pile. We do keep to a pretty similar time for bed in the summer (extended to 9:00 PM, rather than 8-8:30 PM during school) and find that helps her out. Still, there are days . . .

So glad that P- is able to see the world again with new eyes. Can you imagine how frustrating that would be? Like the brakes on your car, you never know how bad they are until they are almost shot.

Thank you for sharing thought provoking posts with all of us.

Ali said...

Great posts! I'm working on several of the exact same things with my 7 year old son! He has worn flip flops and gone barefoot most of the summer and seems to be out of practice! I love it when kids look adults and other kids in the eye but, my son is still working on that! I have one month left and I'm going to work on that same list!

~ Ali