Gracias for the DR

I just returned home from an incredibly special evening with Cabell and a few friends--marking one year since our friend Sweeney went to be with his Maker. As much as I want to write all about it, I think my words will be more meaningful if they have a bit more time to perculate in my mind and heart.

I am learning to let mull things a bit before I rush to the keyboard to record them. In that vein, I am finally ready to record what I learned in the DR. I have boiled it down to this phrase: "Wherever you go, there YOU are."

I hadn't been on a mission trip in over a decade. The last time I travelled somewhere with a group to 'minister' I was in my twenties, unmarried and childless. As a result, I was previously able to become fully engulfed in the mission and the trip. I was without any real responsibilities. I could just BE in the presence of God and fully immerse myself in the work at hand.

Fast forward a decade, and although my scenery, diet and daily schedule had changed upon arrival in the Dominican, I still found myself a wife and mother--struggling with the very same issues I do every day: pride, control, patience, comparison, selfishness. I travelled to a Third World country, but I took myself with me. :-) And I had no Internet or cell phone to escape to.

One of the great gifts of the trip was the presence of V., I woman I have met and interacted with before. She has a child the same age as my children and is a wise and godly woman. Although we were both busy with our respective families and work projects, we were able to have 3 meaningful chats over the course of the week during which we honestly shared our challenges for the purpose of mutual encouragement.

A couple of days ago she sent me a collection of quotes from a book by Henri Nouwen called Gracias (written during his time of ministry in Latin America) that really seemed to summarize a lot of what God taught me about myself and Himself on this trip:

"Instead of running away from these scary feelings, we can live through them together and learn that our true value as human beings has its seat far beyond our competence and accomplishments. One of the most rewarding aspects of living in a strange land is the experience of being loved not for what we can do, but for who we are."

For a doer and an approval seeker like me--this is HUGE.

"The more I think about the meaning of living and acting in the name of Christ, the more I realize that what I have to offer to others is not my intelligence, skill, power, influence or connections, but my own human brokenness through which the love of God can manifest itself."

I think blogging has been an amazing catalyst for God to drive home this lesson in my life. When I share my struggles it is not in an effort to beat myself up, nor is it an effort at feigning humility. I share in order to confess that I need God--and that He is able to meet my every need. My brokenness and need is shared as an encouragement to others to trust Him.

This final quote is the best definition of relational ministry I have ever read. I encourage you to read it a couple of times and commit to being this type of minister in your world.

"Ministry is entering with our human brokenness into communion with others and speaking a word of hope. This hope is not based on any power to solve the problems of those with whom we live, but on the love of God which becomes visible when we let go of our fears of being out of control and enter into His presence in a shared confession of weakness."

The older I get the more I cling to the gift of community, friendship and relationships within the body of Christ. What a beautiful, beautiful gift God gave us in each other!