What, Not Why

Because of scheduling issues, my Monday Night Girls recently became Wednesday Night Girls instead. By making this change, a few of the girls who were previously unable to come are now available to attend. Last night I had the biggest attendance in months (8 girls). Two of them were new residents.

Due to the transient nature of the residents in this type of environment, I never know who will still be at the Home the following week. Because I never know if I am going to have years, months or only weeks to get to know girls, our process of getting to know one another is often accelerated. I make it a point to not ask staff about any of the children's back stories unless I have a concern. 

Interestingly, most of them are fairly forthcoming about whether they are in the state's care due to issues with their caregivers or issues with their own behavior. I rarely even have to ask. Similar to a prisoner's comfort with the question "what are you in for?" most of the girls are fairly open about the broad headlines surrounding their reasons for living at the Home.

I get to know these girls at 8 in the evening on their turf. They are all generally in pajama bottoms with wet hair, having already been through most of their night time routine. I get to know them stripped out of their make up and school clothes as they are giggling and eating cookies. As a result, I don't see them as much different than any other high school girl I have ever gotten to know through youth ministry. So, you can imagine how shocking I still find it when these sweet girls that I love tell me about running away by stealing a car and crossing state lines or the fact they have been in Youth Detention multiple times, the family member that tried to kill them, their self mutilation, how meth is their drug of choice or their consideration of prostitution as a viable career choice when they 'age out' of foster care.

Even as I type these stories (all of which I have heard from girls in the last 6-8 months) I have a hard time reconciling them with the young, clean faces of the girls who shared them with me. The good news is that most of these stories are about the pasts that they are in the process of overcoming. These girls have seen their share of life...and unfortunately it has been a rough start for many of them. But if you were to meet them outside of the home, you wouldn't necessarily know. Thankfully, they do not bear a symbol that marks them as abused, neglected, abandoned, truant, etc...

Last night in Bible Study we talked about the parable of the talents. Specifically, we discussed how each of the servants had no say in how many bags they were entrusted. They were, however, held responsible for how they handled the bags they were given. I have heard this parable many times--but it took on new meaning as I looked into the faces of these girls and thought about it through the lens of their life experience so far.

Life is not fair. Talents, possessions, families, health, etc...are not doled out evenly. Even as I think about these girls, their lives are quite comfortable and safe compared to women their age living in tents in earthquake-ravaged Haiti or impoverished third world countries. 

Ours is not to ask "Why?" it is to ask "What?" What, Lord, do you have for me to do? In this place, at this time, with this life story and these God-placed talents and abilities. Give me the courage to follow Your lead.