I have said this before, but I mean it. I want to freeze time right now.
Life is not perfect, of course, but I just adore the age of my children and the stage we are enjoying. They are independent enough to handle so much around the house on their own--and their pride in accomplishing such is precious. Yet, they still cuddle up next to me to read or for a head or back scratch. I am still Mommy. I get to carry them up the stairs when they are extremely tired. Their breath is still sweet and their toes are still cute. They still have all their baby teeth (which look like Chiclets). They use vocabulary words they cannot quite pronounce. They dress up in costumes any chance they get. They giggle as often as they speak.
I know from being with older children that it will not always be so.
Mommy will become Mom.
They will grow too big to carry.
Their breath, toes and perspiration will begin to smell bad.
Baby teeth will fall out and be replaced by adult ones--which will likely look awkward until they grow into them.
They will be too old for costumes and too cool to giggle quite as often.
They will no longer draw me pictures or ask me to watch their puppet shows.
Little people won't greet me bedside in the morning.
I know each new stage will bring its own blessings, but I will always treasure the ones from this time in our lives.
What disturbs me as much as the change in stage itself, is that I will likely not notice exactly when it happens. When I carry them the last time, I will almost certainly not realize it is the last. The same holds true for each of these milestones. We won't realize their passing until they are gone.
In the meantime, I will simply strive to enjoy these moments...each one...mindful they are fleeting.
12 comments:
Have you read *Let me hold you Longer* by Karen Kingsbury??? If not, you need to. It talks about what you would do if you knew it was the last time...............
So true! And yes, you need to read "Let Me Hold You Longer" - it's hard not to read without tearing up but oh so worth it.
I did not know about that book, but went promptly to amazon and looked at it after your comments. Just the first two preview pages made me cry! Thanks for the referral. I can't wait to get it.
Thanks JMom! I so needed to see/read this. As a mommy of 3 year old twin boys and a farmer that works long hours in the summer; I so often am taxed to the max. I am headed into their rooms now to have some extra time with each of them. There likely will be no more sweet babies some from this mommy and I want to be vigilant in cherishing EVERY moment!
Hugs and Blessings!!!
My neighbor has just suggested I read the Karen Kingsbury book also; as we were talking about "the last times" in our children's lives. I know for certain we have experienced a last "first", as I recently took the last first-day-of-school picture of my son. It has made me realize that I'm glad I never knew when most of the "last times" would be.
The book is wonderful and she added something like it in her Redemption series. I used her ideas of the "lasts" to write my daughter a letter for graduation from high school. "I would have held on a little longer had I known it was her last" was a great starting point for remembering many milestones in her 19 years as the child who made me a mommy! Enjoy them! Time steals away quickly.
I had a friend who was always saying that she couldn't wait until her kids were out of the house and on their own. And although I had good and bad days with my kids, I truely learned to enjoy them...whatever age and whatever they were going through. Sometimes they will remind me of something "awful" that they did when they were younger, and I don't remember it. That did do some things that I know I didn't like or behaved in ways that I had to correct. But I can say without any reservation that I am blessed. Even the teen years that everybody said that I would dread were not bad. Enjoy your kids...whatever age. You will reap blessing after blessing if you do.
Thanks for sharing, today I have been in a reflecting mood. Even though I am still single, when I am with all my family for the weekend I realize how quickly the moments fade, but the memories I have are what matters. My entire family is together this weekend, now my brother is married and we are no longer a family of 4 things are different, but in a good way. Sometimes I wish I could go back a few years and cherish special moments a little more. Glad you recognize and embrace their little lives. They are truly blessed children! Have a great weekend!
Blessings from Texas,
Ashley
With a three and a five year old myself I can totally relate. I keep telling myself that I'll always have the privilege and joy of loving my girls, just not in the ways I get to love them now, with stories and giggles and cuddles and all the other sweet things of innocent childhood. It's like sand through my fingers. Fortunately, I started blogging, for the express purpose of recording my memories of their childhoods, before it got too late.
Great post! And I'm headed to Amazon now to order that book!
This got me, I cried. I know exactly what you are feeling here.
And a few posts down, I love that song. It is my current favorite. My favorite line is about His grace being an ocean and we are all sinking. I love that picture, being totally overwhelmed by grace. Awesome.
Hi! So I'm one of those anonymous readers (which sounds so sketchy whenever I think of it) who stumbled upon your blog about a year and a half ago while procrastinating from wedding planning and reading some of my friends' blogs (I'm from Alabama, so I guess we're some number of degrees separated from each other and Kevin Bacon, of course). It has become a habit to check your blog whenever I check theirs, because I love to hear your bits of wisdom and Christ-centered outlook on life. Your words have carried even more meaning during the past year, as I have had my first year as a newlywed and tried to be purposeful in our journey as a new family of two.
I would have been completely content to remain anonymous, but the daughter in me wanted to comment on the post, because I wanted you to hear the perspective of someone who recently made that final transition from my family of origin to my new family with my husband.
Although I might not call her by that name anymore, my Mom will always be "Mommy" (and in my most vulnerable moments, I do still say "Mama"). My mom and dad might not physically carry me up and down stairs as they once did, but their strength, faith, and love have carried me through all of the highs and lows of life. My toes (and hips) grew, "morning breath" set in, and the orthodontist became necessary, but in many ways those changes are the outward manifestation of an internal awareness of body image and physical metamorphosis, and my parents built up my outward esteem while reminding me that true beauty comes from within. It's true that with these changes come the awareness of being "cool," but laughter is contagious at any age, one is never too old to wear a tiara, and whether stated explicitly or not, children will always crave the love and attention of thier parents--be it a puppet show, a football game, or the school play. And I will never be too big or too old to climb into bed with my mom and have her scratch my back.
Middle school, hormones, and all the changes that come with those years are inevitable, but as life continues to evolve, so do we, and I've found (in my short time and experience so far) that the phase soon after that is one of complete and unabashed gratitude and love for the parents who loved us despite (and because of) our bad breath, awkward teeth, gangly arms, and desire to be dropped off at school a block away.
Part of my enjoyment of your blog comes from my fascination with parenthood and desire to soak in the examples before me prior to setting out on any family expansion of my own in the future. For their human fallability, my parents got it as close to perfect as I've ever seen. Their wisdom, counsel, and love have guided me through life thus far and through my first year of marriage, and the most lasting lessons came at a tender age but were repeated throughout each phase of my life.
Put God first. Share with others. Show your teammates you want the ball, and they'll pass it to you. Use your imagination. Pray. Respect authorities. Give to those less fortunate. Be grateful. Discover your talents. Pity not those who try and fail; pity those who fail to try. Remain pure. Surround yourself with quality friends, because they'll either take you up or take you down. And my Dad's favorite line when we would leave the house each day, "Just remember, you're representing the family." And on, and on, and on.
The seeds you are sowing now in your young childrens' hearts will bloom into a deep faith and abiding love as they grow and face the changes to come. And they WILL be forever grateful to you because of your purposeful parenting. Trust me on that.
I know you already know all of this deep down, but I just wanted to remind you, one daughter to a mother, that it only gets better.
11 years old too heavy to hold and I still do it when she asks me to. It is getting longer and longer between times she asks me to hold her though. Next time, because of your post, i will not put her down (like i did on the beach this weekend) when she gets too heavy. I will hold her until she pulls away, even if it kills me!
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