Lessons in Love

I am amazed at the lessons I am learning in love as I watch my family mature and grow. I can remember first learning in a high school Bible Study about the three different Greek words for love. I understood agape in a basic sense. My young, fresh faith still saw God as a combination of Santa Claus and a wise, powerful Father-figure. Phileo love seemed easiest to grasp as I was blessed with wonderful high school friendships. Eros love was still mysterious, but something I certainly hoped to one day experience.

Lately I have been overcome by the deeper levels of understanding of these three words. Agape love becomes more mysterious each day that I live. I am humbled by God's relentless pursuit of me despite my unworthiness. His grace blows me away. As a mother, I have a renewed appreciation for His position as Heavenly Father and am heartbroken at the power of His Gift: the sacrifice of His only son.

Eros, the love my heart was designed to only feel for one man. An incredible man who is not quite perfect, but was absolutely created by God just for me. This is a gift for which I am deeply grateful every day. Who knew such imperfect people could be united in such a perfect way? It is truly a miracle of God.

And, finally, phileo. When I thought about having a family, I always imagined the deeper love I would experience as I looked into a little face that was a perfectly unique combination of my husband and me. I could not fathom the deep, soul-stirring love I would feel as my offspring fit perfectly into my lap, or as they nuzzled my face or initiated a hug or hand-holding.

What I also failed to consider was the way I would feel as I watched them express affection for each other. In the first couple of years they were aware of each other, but largely unimpressed. Lately, their bond of friendship has become something truly beautiful. They care for each other. They enjoy each other. Yes, sometimes they even thoroughly annoy each other.

This afternoon, P was complaining of a tummy ache. I sent him to try to potty, then gave him some crackers and water. A few minutes later, I heard K speaking softly to him. As I turned from my dishwashing I found her gently rubbing his stomach, asking if that made it better, then she placed her hands on either side of his face and kissed his nose.

I am realizing that their love for each other is a gift far greater than I could have imagined. I have such comfort knowing when I am not around, they are able to provide that same level of security, care and support for one another. I realize the road may not always be smooth in their relationships, but the glimpses I see now are so powerful, I pray they will remain.