Tonight as I finished tucking the children in and was turning the nightlight on in an adjoining room I heard R's voice softly calling me.
"Mom?"
I have to confess that I am usually a bit impatient with these bedtime add-ons. Selfishly, I declare myself 'off the clock.' These last minute requests tend to be far more about stall tactics than matters of importance. Every now and then they knock the breath out of me. Something about the softness of R's tone tonight made me pay attention.
"Yes?" I responded.
"Maybe we can get your birfday moved to December."
"Why would we do that?" I asked.
"So we can catch up to you and be the same age. Then we can go to da cemetary at the same time instead of you going before us."
"Oh, sweetie..." That was really all I could muster off the cuff.
"How much older are you than us?" P asked.
"30 years older," I responded.
I saw the wheels turning in their little brains.
"God has a plan, guys. It will all be okay."
I like to have the answers. I like wisdom, life lessons, hope and neat little bows at the end of conversations (and blog posts). I am learning in lots of different ways in this season of my life that there are many things on this side of Heaven we will never understand or be able to explain. Some things just require faith.
"Some say faith is a childish game.
Play on, children, like its Christmas Day."
-lyrics from Live Forever by Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors
7 comments:
Aww...aren't they sweet? I had my son at age 30. Now he's ten and he finds it very entertaining to tell me what age I will be when he is 20, 30, 40 years old...and he always laughs at the face I make :-) Truth be told, I will be happy to be old, old, old and still around to enjoy him!
I was nodding my head at the impatient at bedtime remark. I too feel this sometimes. I loved your response. It is great to be able to say that God has it under control. It helps me to remember that fact too!
You have the sweetest kids! These types of conversations can be hard. I remember having one with my now 5-yr-old when she was about 3 or so. We were talking about heaven and she insisted she didn't want to go. She wanted to stay with me. I had to explain that I plan to go too, but she insisted she didn't want to think about it until it was time. So we don't. We talk about heaven being were God is, but that's it. I just wonder sometimes what they are thinking and don't express.
So very sweet. Reminds me of the Winnie the Pooh quote, "If you live to be 100..." Such bright little minds your three possess; and so able to express themselves well. I'm always touched by their flashes of deep compassion and thoughtfulness. And I'm so glad you heard that in this bedtime question...
This made me cry. It's hard to realize that we won't always have our parents with us, but I like your answer. God has a plan. He always has a plan.
I've been getting so many questions too about life and especially death and heaven and all that...SO hard to answer! (Especially when it's way past bedtime.)
Having just lost my sweet Mama last week, I can relate to R's emotions. I will be 50 in a few months, and she was 69. I so wish she hadn't had to go to the cemetery before me, or at least so long before me. How blessed I was to learn the quiet lessons of her life.
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