A few weeks ago one of my Monday night Bible Study girls asked me, "So, what do you do for your job, Ms. Jennifer?"
I answered that I was a full time Mom.
"What do you do while your kids are at school? Don't you get bored?"
I explained that there were chores around the house, bills to pay, errands to run--and that I spent time volunteering at the kids' school, at the childrens' home, going to Bible Study, etc.
"But, what do you do for money?"
"Do you have to ask your husband?"
"Not me! I won't ever depend on a man for money! I want my own stuff."
I tried to explain that marriage didn't work that way. It is a partnership. My husband's job earns the paycheck, but I have important responsibilities as well.
They were not buying it. All they could think about was having the respect that they thought having their own money would bring. I was sad as I thought about their perspective. Then I had a rough couple of weeks with very little time with my husband around the house. Last weekend he had a deacon retreat. I had a afternoon into evening roadtrip with girls. Then he was on call this weekend (which translates to 12 hour days at the hospitals, plus literally a couple of pages an hour all night long when he is home.) My kids still have the Winter crud, complete with all night coughing, 6 weeks after it first entered my home...and my hormones are in a vulnerable place, if you know what I mean!
Suddenly, I find myself acting out as if I am one of those teen aged girls. I JUST WANT RESPECT! my pride seems to be screaming.
Yesterday morning as I sat alone in church, frankly thankful for the brief break the nursery was providing, our pastor said something that zinged me to the core.
"Everyone says they want to be a servant, until they are treated like one."
Don't misunderstand me. I do want to raise respectful, courteous children not demanding, ungrateful ones...but it is a fine line sometimes between what is truly disrespect and what is my pride. I don't want to be the martyr Mom softly humming "Poor, poor pitiful me."
Rescue me, Lord. Give me a right perspective. Grant me wisdom to know what behaviors and attitudes are issues I need to address in my children--and which ones are things You need to address with me. I need You.
And could you please help us finally get healthy so we can sleep?