So Much to Say

God is doing a work in my life. For the last several days I have been wrestling and thinking and praying. It feels like it is time to start trying to write about it, if for no other reason that to clear some space in my brain and start trying to put the pieces together into a form that resembles a point...as opposed to all this chaos floating around in my thoughts.

I never aspired to be someone who thinks so much. I once considered myself fairly spunky and spontaneous, but God has used parenthood to awaken this primal need in me to live my life on purpose and for a purpose. I desire to be intentional, not accidental, each day. Yet, I believe in a Sovereign God--the Big Man with a plan--so I must submit my will constantly in exchange for listening for His Will. What a struggle for a practical thinker and planner!

Over the course of the last week, as I have read the daily testimonies of the bloggers in Uganda I have been moved in a new way to love people--regardless of where on this Earth they live. I must confess, that while I have supported international missions monetarily, I have not felt a strong pull of my heart towards those people groups in the past. Perhaps it is because of my involvement in local missions with foster children and unchurched & disinterested suburban youth...but I have found myself much more of a 'think globally, act locally' girl. There are so many needs HERE, I can't think about THERE.

This week, things have been shifting. It has made me nervous. I was beginning to wonder if God was about to rock my world and send me to the plains of Africa. But God brought it all back to a clear point for me this morning in church. It is our missions emphasis month. This morning, as I listened to missionaries speak about local youth ministry in our town and then international ministry in China I felt affirmed that there is MUCH to do. We are an entire planet of people in need of the love of Jesus, through the words, prayers and actions of each other. Whether we are thousands of miles away or simply in line at the post office or wiping runny noses of preschoolers in our home...we are to be the hands and feet of Jesus to EVERYONE we meet.

Please don't misunderstand me, I feel led to pray for and offer monetary support for ministry overseas...but I am learning that is not a question of one or the other. In many regards it is all the same work. No people group is any greater or any less than another. We are all a part of the body. I am so incredibly thankful for those who respond to the call of God to go into these places as strangers and bring the light and love of God, but I am finally feeling free of some of the guilt I once held that I wasn't going there too. We all have different calls...and yet they are the same.

"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." John 13:34-35

I want to be known by my love for my fellow man. Yet, many times I make practical decisions that seem I want to be known for having it together moreso than for living a life marked first and foremost by love.

Lord, help me to really love those I encounter in my daily life. This is the life You placed me in. In all your Sovereignty, through all of the history of the world, you chose to place me here...in this town, in this time. My life, my place is no accident--it is ordained. May I be a faithful steward of the opportunity you have entrusted me with.

Consider Matthew 5:13-16. It is a familiar passage, but I loved the fresh take from the Message version.

"Let me tell you why you are here. You're here to be salt-seasoning that brings out the God-flavors of this earth. If you lose your saltiness, how will people taste godliness? You've lost your usefulness and will end up in the garbage."

"Here's another way to put it: You're here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We're going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don't think I'm going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I'm putting you on a light stand. Now that I've put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you'll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven."